Chapter Six:🔗

Could You please talk to us about the difference between suppressing and expressing our emotions through our mind?

You have two choices. You can either suppress your emotions, or you can transform them. Suppression and transformation exists as two aspects to the same thing. This thing is that man can change himself. And man is the only creation of Existence who has been given the choice to change himself.

Look at any other creature that exists. Birds exist, plants exist; there are so many animals that exist, but they cannot do anything about their existence. They are apart of one big whole, they do not have the ability to stand out of it. They exist as a whole. They cannot separate themselves.

This is not the case with man. He is totally different. He can do something about himself. He has the ability to observe himself as though he were a witness. He can watch his energies as though they were separate from him. He can either suppress his energies or he can transform them into something greater.

Suppressing a certain energy is to simply hide what is already there. By suppressing, you will not be allowing them to be expressed at their own lengths. Transforming a certain energy means to change it into a new dimension.

See, there are so many emotions which society does not accept. There are many emotions which make you feel embarrassed. And this embarrassment is not your embarrassment. It is the embarrassment which society has taught you to feel.

Suppression seems to be the easiest way to avoid the vulnerability of the ego. It exists as a protection, as a security measure. And what are you getting out of fighting with your emotions? By fighting, the emotion is not going to disappear. If anything, you will create the illusion that it has disappeared. And all of a sudden, the emotion will happen in full swing.

Now, when there is an emotion which proves disturbing to you, do not suppress. Simply become aware of it. Awareness is the key to any transformation. And if you can transform your energies, then no energy will act as a disturbance to you.

A small story: Two monks were traveling along a road. It was raining heavily. The roads were filled with mud and large pools of water here and there. At a bend, they saw a beautiful girl in a silk dress standing helplessly on the road. She wanted to cross over to the other side of the road but could not because of the water. One of the monks lifted her in his arms and put her down on the other side. The monks took shelter in a lodging temple that night. The second monk then said to the first, ‘Monks are not allowed to go near woman, especially young and pretty woman. Why did you carry that girl like that?’ The first monk said, ‘I left the girl there, why are you still carrying her?’

So understand: if you can become aware, no particular energy will disturb you. Unawareness leads to the carrying of emotions. If you can remain completely aware and at the same time remain a witness, after the incident has passed, it would have passed from your mind as well.

Start to witness all that you do throughout your day. Start with simple activities first. When you are eating, become aware. Feel every morsel which touches your lips; feel it moving down your throat. Enter into it completely. While walking, become aware. Feel every step. And I am not only saying to become aware of external things; you must also become aware of what is happening internally. Watch your thoughts; see the quality of your mind when awareness is added. The very quality will change. When awareness is there, thoughts cease. And if you can become aware of what is happening to you internally, witnessing happens automatically.

Now the next question that will come is, ‘What is meant by witnessing?’ Witnessing is watching all that is happening both within and without you. Not simply watching; it is watching as if you are watching from the outside. You should not feel as if anything is happening to you. Just as you would watch a movie, you should watch your life. It is all happening to someone else.

And the whole of life is just one big drama. This is the truth. We are all actors on a big stage. But over time, by continuously acting, we have forgotten that we are actors. We start thinking that the drama has become reality.

So by witnessing, one becomes aware of the drama again. Then nothing will disturb you. There will be no suppression, and at the same time, there will be no expression. Because the understanding will be there; you will understand that even if something is getting expressed, it is not getting expressed by you. This is because you are the witness, not the actor.

Just as the monk in the story accepts whatever is, you should accept and move on. Simply accept life as is and become aware of it.

A man who suppresses his desires will close his eyes when something disturbs him outside. And with these same closed eyes, what will happen? He will be doing all possible nonsense! Now, I am not saying that indulgence is correct, because as of now, society is such that if you go around indulging in everything, you will be looking a little funny! So now, when something is the cause of disturbance in you, do not suppress, and do not indulge. Find a balance between the two. Become aware of what is happening in you. There is no need to close your eyes or turn your head to what is acting as a disturbance in you. Accept what you are seeing and what you are feeling. Acceptance and awareness, as I have said before, is the sure way to transformation.

I tell you now: become aware, accept, and you will see yourself moving beyond an emotion or energy which disturbs you.

We will meet in the next session.