Books / Open the Door...Let the Breeze in! Part 2 English merged

11. 52. Maturity of Character.

# 52. Maturity of Character

A gentleman had finished engineering in I.I.T. and was employed in U.S.A. He was earning in lakhs. While talking to me he said: My father, who made me touch the zenith of achievements, is a fool. I am also a fool.

I asked: Why do you say so? He replied: My father dreamt right from my childhood, that I should become a very big man. And to make that really come true, he spared no efforts at all and educated me. He also motivated me for my success. He toiled for 25 long years. He rested only when I got a job in the U.S. Then only he got time to live his own life. Only after that did we come to know that while we have accumulated what all are needed for life, we have not at all learned to live the life in this world. For the question, 'What does life mean?' the reply we get is only, 'We are fools'. Please tell us a way for this.

Be sure of one truth. All your efforts and labour can only make your body to be alive. They cannot make even your mind to come to life.

  • Surpassing your body, to make your mind and your conscious feelings to come to life and to make them flourish, you must get maturity of mind. You have to separately strain yourself and work hard for that.

  • Getting maturity of character is one of the very important steps for an ordinary man to get enlightenment.

  • Anger, Affection, Fear

  • Maturity of character is only the ability to have these feelings under one's own control and to handle these in such a way so as not to get affected himself or to affect others.

  • Enlightenment is only the mental maturity in going beyond the feelings, and making one self as well as others live in a state of rapture.

  • The first and foremost action one has to take in order to pass beyond all sorts of behavioral aberrations and obtain maturity of character is to list out the extent to which a person himself as well as others have been affected by mental aberrations.

The very act of 'making out a list' will make the mental and behavioral confusions disappear and it will nurture mental maturity. Consciously make out a list and see. You will understand.

A collection of interesting conversations between two persons...

Sunday: Evening 6.30 (On the phone)

'What boss! You don't care for me nowadays. If you have any work you come to my house. Otherwise, you don't bother about me at all. Speak for some more time, boss! I would like to go on and on hearing your voice.'

Monday: Morning Time 7.30 (On the phone)

'You stupid, reduce the volume of the T.V. I can't hear in the phone at all. Who is speaking? Oh! Is it you? OK, Ok, whatever it is, we can talk it over today evening at 6 after I come home. I will disconnect now.'

Monday: Evening. Time 6.00 (On the house)

'Oh! Come, come, come. We should be fortunate and blessed for good people like you to come to our house.'

Wednesday: Afternoon Time 3.00 (on the way)

'Sir, don't be dragging on. Say exactly and to the point, what you want to say... I have got a lot of work to do.'

Friday: Morning Time 8.00 (On the phone).

'Hello! Is healer Ananda Sridhar available...

Oh Sridhar, right from morning, I was thinking about you only. I would like to see you...'

Saturday: Evening. Time 7.00 (In the Ananda healing centre)

'I came here thinking that you will give me some consoling words. What is it you are saying? "I" only is the reason for all problems, you are saying. Keep your Vedanta with yourself only. Leave me alone.'

Sunday: Evening. Time 6.30 (On the phone)

'What boss? What? Are you angry with me? Excuse me boss! Yesterday, in some bad temper, I spoke so. Please be talking some more time boss! I like to hear your voice continuously.

All these different faces and talks were all that of one single individual Thandavamurthy and these were towards the person Ananda Sridhar, a healer of Dhyanapeetam and all these in just one week.

Is it surprising?

If you are surprised... that means you are not aware of the truth that...

Time and again, we as well as others are out and out, exhibiting varied and different faces and feelings.

It is only the result of Thandavamurthy dancing to the tunes of the dictations of the mind, that he was speaking politely as 'Boss' at one time, and then saying, 'Don't be dragging on; leave me alone' next time and again addressing Sridhar as before as 'Boss'.

'When the nature of the people changes, colour changes, quality also changes' – this truth can be understood by a person by the maturity of his character.

When others exhibit anger due to the tribulations of their feelings, we also show anger and hatred, it is only an indication that we have not yet got the maturity of character.

Only when we stamp it saying, 'These are the items to my liking' the ammunition is made ready for our mental aberrations.

To whatever extent things of our liking give us happiness, to the same extent the things we do not like will make us drown in sorrow.

A very nice statement of a Hasid explaining this:

The depth of the rising Is the height of sorrow!

For a person who has got mental maturity, 'applaud' will not make him 'enamored'; 'despise' will not make him 'lose heart'.

When Thandavamurthy showed extremes of anger, hatred and disgust, Sridhar was not bothered at all.

Remaining with the feeling of grace, unmoved by any thing at any time is the whole outcome of maturity of character.

It is my desire that each one of you should reach this state and taste the joy of life.

To attain such maturity, there is a beautiful statement of the Zen master Moorey Sen...

Become a dry leaf in the wind! Become a cork in the river!

What wonderful golden words!

A dry leaf will just sail along with the wind. Cork will float and sail along with the flow of water. But leaf will be a leaf; cork will remain a cork.

Both will not have any difficulty.

I call this state only as maturity.

Changing ourselves as a cork in the river of life is only maturity of character.

If we change..., the truth will be known that –

Like us, others also struggle due to the afflictions of feelings.

Like us, they also lose their self-control some times, not knowing what they do, they also pour out their anger on others.

Instead of anger, Grace will be born.

Instead of hatred,

Love will be born.

Disgust will change as joy.

When?

If only you permit your character to mature!

A meaningful incident.

A family man went to Rishi Bharatha and said, 'I wish to become an ascetic.'

Rishi said, 'A lie. You are telling in a polished manner that you are not willing to face the world.'

Further, he said, 'The maximum qualification for being a family man is the minimum qualification to be an ascetic. Now tell me, do you wish to become an ascetic?'

It is not important, who you are.

Only maturity of character is important.

Meditation chisels. Chisel No.7.