Love makes life happen to you🔗

Today, I will expand on how integrity and authenticity expand your relationships and enrich you to have fulfillment. I wanted to make three statements about relationships.

First, relationship does not only mean the few human beings who live around you. When I use the word ‘relationship’, I mean your relationship with your health, your money, your success, your life, with nature, with everything!

Second, you also have a very inauthentic way of dreaming about your life. You just want to have a few cozy relationships around you, and that is enough. You are complete with your relationships and relationship dimension that is completely wrong and inauthentic!

Third, only when you expand yourself with integrity and authenticity, anything and anybody who comes into your breathing space will have a conflict-free and complete relationship. You will experience fulfillment and success.

'Relationships' are not related to quantity, but related to quality!

Please listen, the last statement takes the concept of relationship to a completely different level altogether. Let us start from the beginning. I will expand on these principles.

When you bring integrity, you will heal all the broken relationships, the conflicts which you are creating, and created in the past. Listen! When you bring integrity, the conflicts which you are creating in the present and the conflicts which you created in the past, get healed.

Let me repeat these three statements which I made, and then you will understand them one by one.

LISTEN! You need to understand the principle of relationships in a larger context. Any conflict experienced in your inner space reminds you of your inauthenticities in relationships. When you have the idea that relationships are nothing but what you experience with a few people, you have very narrow and low ideas. When you bring integrity, you will heal all the damage you caused inside and outside you, due to relationships. It will heal the ignorance you had in the zone of relationships.

Listen, your ignorance in the space of relationships not only causes damage in others, it also causes damage in you. Be very clear, when you cause damage in your spouse, mother or father, you cause damage in you, because your father, mother or spouse - all the relationships you carry decide the confidence and the energy that you have about you! Your inauthenticity is exposed to you again and again, whenever there is a conflict in relationships. Whenever you experience conflict in any relationship, your inauthenticity is exposed to you.

Listen! Bring integrity as a principle to live, as a space from where you will operate. I am not just making a statement. Integrity should not only be there in your actions, but also in the space from where you act, from where your cognition happens!

I am so happy that we reclaimed our integrity in the sangha. In the initial years, when I started the sangha, I used to be very clear with the program participants about integrity and responsibility. Unfortunately, in course of time, when thousands started gathering for programs, I was not able to spend time with each person and remind them about integrity and responsibility. But now, by the divine grace, when I took the responsibility and put my foot down, we are once again reminding people about the strength of integrity, authenticity, responsibility and enriching.

I can see that from January 1ˢᵗ 2013, when we entered a new decade, we also entered a space where we will never decay anymore. In 2003, we were born; in 2013, we have become mature. I want all of you to understand, it is not just action. It is the space from which you operate. When you bring integrity as a space inside you, as the space in which you perceive, experience and operate in, so much of healing suddenly happens to you and to others who are living around you, who are fortunately or unfortunately relating with you.

Listen! One of the important healing factors in relationships is the other person feeling confident that you are transformed, that you are going to be different in the future. To tell you honestly, nobody is too serious about the past hurt. Everybody's expectation is about what the future will be. If you give them the confidence and assurance that the future will really be transformed, authentic and responsible, there is nobody who is not ready to heal their past or drop their past. Everyone is waiting, waiting to drop their past and relate with you in a new way. Who is interested in carrying the past wounds? Just like how you are waiting to drop the past and have a new future, everyone is waiting to drop the past and create a new future.

When you bring integrity, you will first give the confidence to others that they can expect a new you in their life, a new being in their life, a transformed being in their life. Suddenly, even you start trusting that your transformation is real! Yesterday I was reading the status update of one of my disciples on Facebook. She writes, 'I am not able to relate with the person I was. I am not even able to remember that person!' She has signed her post with the spiritual name I gave her a few days ago. When I read this, I felt, 'Wow, so beautiful!' When you feel that you are not able to relate with

your old personality after bringing these four principles into your life, I tell you, your transformation is real, and it is going to be permanent.

Even you feel that you are a new being and you can't relate with your old being. So others will also naturally respond. There is nobody who wants to carry on with the old past, and hurt the future. Just like you are intelligent enough to drop the past and get into the future, everyone is intelligent enough, even though you don't believe that others are intelligent enough to drop the past and go into the future!

There is one more thing that you need to know. Only after integrity heals the damages you caused to yourself and others in the past does the real relationship start. Your authenticity has to come into play. It has to start the drama now. Authenticity has the power to expand your possibilities of relating with anything, with anything. I could see some of my swamis, they are suddenly able to relate with anybody!

Authenticity gives you the power to relate with anybody and anything! When you have authenticity; even when you touch a flower, your touch will be different. When you touch a hammer to crack the stone, to break the stone, the touch will be different. When you touch a flower for worship, the touch will be different. Authenticity brings different qualities and different dimensions to relate with everything with which you are relating. Even you feel that you are new, you cannot relate with your old being. So, others will also naturally respond in the same way. With integrity and authenticity, you will experience the new you in you, which will be new, new, new, new, new for everyone! I have seen in my experience that when authenticity happens, you are ready to spontaneously relate with every new being who is coming in your presence. And I have also seen some people running away from society and hiding themselves in caves in the name of meditation. Listen!

Sitting in a cave and meditating is not wrong, but if you are doing it for the wrong reason, it is wrong. If you are inauthentic and unable to handle the people who come in your space authentically and spontaneously, you just want to escape from all relationships, and so you go and hide in the caves, it is inauthentic. Everything, everything has to happen out of completion!

Living out of completion is your birthright. The first thing that every human being should do when you start living your life is to find the root thought patterns which are causing you suffering, and complete them. That completion gives you the courage to relate with human beings with integrity and authenticity.

People are afraid to relate with other human beings. Even when you go to meet your friend, you prepare all the statements you have to tell him. Why can't you be spontaneous? Even to meet with your friend, why do you need so much of preparathion? Why do you need so much of inauthentic strategy planning? Why do you need so much of non-integrity and verbal preparation?

It is so unfortunate; the trust level with your friends has dropped because the trust between you and you has dropped. You are afraid even with you, you don't spontaneously sit even with you; you rehearse and talk even to you! That is why

you can’t talk spontaneously with others. Everything has to happen out of completion. When things happen out of completion, it leads to completion. The reason also has to be right, not just the action.

When you are ready to stretch yourself to honor all the words you gave to you, you will easily stretch yourself to honor all the words you gave to others.

You always think, ‘Oh, honoring the words I gave to me is very easy. But honoring the words I gave to others is very difficult.’ No! You think satisfying you is very easy and satisfying others is very difficult. I say, ‘No! You are wrong. Satisfying others is very easy. Satisfying you is the real job you need to do!’

Why do you think you prepare the whole dialogue even when you go to meet your close friend? It is not just to satisfy him. When you come back after the meeting, you will think about whether you performed well or not, and you will drill yourself to satisfy you! You are preparing so much to satisfy you.

How many of you cognize this? After every meeting, you drill and scan yourself to find out if you performed well or not. You do not understand that if you scan after the happening, it is not just censoring, it is a post-mortem report. No post-mortem report can be satisfying, because it is done on a dead person!

Listen! Authenticity means stretching yourself to fulfill your expectations about you, and others’ expectations about you. The moment you hear this word, your mind immediately says, ‘No, no, no, no, no! I can never fulfill others’ expectations. Forget about it, because this guy wants me as this, that guy wants me as that, and this guy wants me as this, and that guy wants me as that!’ When you decide that you can never fulfill others’ expectations in your life, you literally destroy you! I am not saying that you will be able to fulfill everyone’s expectations about you. You may not be able to fulfill it until the end, but when you already decide that you will not be able to fulfill it, you will be dead!

Listen, I am not saying that you can fulfill everyone’s expectation about you. But when you decide that you can’t fulfill others’ expectations about you, you are dead! You decide to be dead. You stop allowing the life happening in you. Life happens to you, life brings you excitement only when you go on stretching yourself to fulfill others’ expectations. Taking responsibility to fulfill others’ expectations, even if they are not fulfilling your expectations, is love.

Taking responsibility to fulfill others expectations even if they are not fulfilling, or not ready to fulfill, your expectations, is love! Take the responsibility for love; that is where the relationship starts. Do not say to anybody, ‘I love you,’ unless you are ready to take the responsibility to fulfill their expectations about you, without bothering about whether they are ready to fulfill your expectations or not. When they are fulfilling your expectations, and you are also fulfilling their expectations authentically, it is called a business partnership. It is a partnership in the business called life. Don’t call it as love.

Sometime, you not only have partners in business; you also have even in life. Maybe you can use the word 'life-business partner'! Life happens to you, life brings you excitement, only when you go on fulfilling others' expectations!

What is love? I will define love. Listen! Only when you take responsibility to fulfill others' expectations about you, without bothering about whether others fulfill your expectations or not, it is love.

Utter the words 'I love you' towards anybody only when you are ready to take the responsibility to fulfill their expectations about you, without expecting them to fulfill your expectations from them. Otherwise don't tell them, 'I love you'. Don't abuse the words, 'I love you'. It will lose its power if you use it very loosely.

If you fulfill others' expectations and others fulfill your expectations, it is more like a business. Love means that you take the responsibility to fulfill the other's expectations about you, without even bothering about others fulfilling your expectations. That is where love starts. Love is the basic component for relationships.

Listen, love is beyond business. Love makes life happen in you. When you decide to fulfill others' expectations without bothering about whether others will fulfill your expectations, your muscle-memory is filled with so much of life.

When, I declare that I love my sangha, I take the responsibility to fulfill your expectations about me, without bothering whether you will fulfill my expectation. A glimpse of love makes you naturally expand yourself for more and more love.

I have a question from 'Enriching Temple'. 'What if someone's expectation from you is limiting them, and not expanding them?'

Listen, even if others' expectation about you is limiting them, stretch yourself to fulfill it. Then make them understand that they need to expand; not before that. Only then will they understand their inauthenticity. Others are ready to listen about their inauthenticity from you, only when you prove that you are authentic. A glimpse of love makes you expand more and more in love.

When you take responsibility for one person and decide, 'I will fulfill your expectation about me, even if you don't fulfill my expectation about you,' you decide to bring love into your heart; you decide to bring relationship into your life. I tell you, even one love, one relationship will bring so much of joy, love, life and laughter in you, you will see that you want to play this game again and again and again; you will want to expand this with every possible relationship. Loving everyone, educating everyone, taking responsibility for everyone, with the understanding, 'I am not doing this for any reason; I am just enjoying feeling expanded, so I continue to do so, and I will be continuously doing so!'

Whether others fulfill your expectations or not, when you fulfill their expectations, it brings so much of fulfillment in you! It brings so much of fulfillment in you! I tell you, you will simply decide this as a strategy planning of your life – authenticity, love and expansion! The best strategy plan for your life is the decision to love and build relationships.

I have a question here: 'What if I realize that others' expectations are limiting me? Should I still fulfill them?'

Listen! First fulfill them, and then make them understand that you are limited by their expectations. Go on expanding to fulfill others' expectation. I tell you, the energy which you use to defend yourself from others, and the energy you need to stretch yourself to others' expectations, both are one and the same. In fact, you need less energy to stretch yourself to fulfill others expectations than to constantly defend yourself from others. Your energy will be used only for two purposes; either for constantly defending yourself from others, or stretching yourself to fulfill others' expectations about you.

Inauthenticity constantly keeps the imagination and fantasies of shrinking, coziness and smallness alive in you. You always imagine a vacation, living in a small hut on the beach, in one corner of the world where nobody else is there, just eating and sleeping! You imagine that that's the way you will be in peace and in completion. What an inauthentic imagination, that your mind goes on feeding you!

First of all, how will you reach that corner of the world where no human beings are there? Second, who will make the hut for you, and who is going to give you food? Keeping impossible imaginations as your fantasies, and continuing to prolong incompletions and inauthenticity in your life, is delusion. How many of you are running and working with this kind of impossible vacations as your imagination? Raise your hands. How many of you have these impossible vacations as your imagination? Be very clear, you are running towards delusion. Relax.

Listen! Whenever the planet Rahu is negative towards you, the first thing he gives you is inauthentic imaginations and visualizations. The planet Ketu reminds you about the inauthenticity of your visualizations and imaginations. Listen, whenever you are asked to face your inauthenticity, Ketu is helping you. Whenever your inauthentic imaginations are becoming strong in you, Rahu is overpowering you.

I have another question - 'Can Swamiji give an example for how others' expectations limit us, but we still continue to fulfill that?'

For example, you expect me to be a CEO. You constantly expect me to act as a CEO for you, which is limiting me from my authenticity. But I continue to fulfill your expectation about me as a CEO, guiding you even in mundane things. The authenticity of my level is just to be guiding you with spiritual principles and giving you these tattvas, and making you live and expand and achieve success. But you go on expecting me to be your CEO, supplying day-to-day ideas, supporting you, guiding you, inspiring you, listening to you, spending time with you. All this is limiting me, but I still continue to fulfill your expectation about

me.

Even if it is limiting you, fulfill others' expectations, and then make them understand that it is limiting you, but you are going to continue to fulfill it.

The essence of today's satsang is this: integrity, authenticity and responsibility can enrich your relationship and love. With integrity, authenticity and responsibility, a Ganga of love opens in you and in your relationships!

I bless you all to achieve success in the completion process. I bless you all achieve, experience, live, express, radiate, share, explode and enrich with eternal bliss, 'Nithayananda'!

Listen! You are the source of everything and you are responsible for everything. Only when you understand the truth that 'you' are responsible for everything, the possibility for expansion starts!