September 10🔗

Tinku Kishen came back home after a month-long holiday at her mother's. Her husband's friend whispered to him, "So, do you now need to give an account of your whereabouts for the past one month?" The husband replied, "No, that's part of the maid's job."

The best way is to watch Life as a spectator and understand the roles of the players without getting perturbed by anything.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Barsi Rajan paid an unannounced visit to his new neighbours. He spent over an hour talking to them, completely oblivious of their growing impatience. Finally, one of them ventured, "Sir, your family must be missing you!" Barsi exclaimed, "Oh! Thankyou for saying that. Let me call them over!"

When we fail to see the world from the other's perspective, we are missing a major dimension of co- existence.

Bhilai Mansoor was carrying three walking sticks and walking down the road. A curious passerby asked him why. Bhilai replied, "I have one which I might leave in the bus, one which I might leave in my workplace and I would still have one to use on the way back home!"

Strangely, we nurture our lacking ways with concern instead of attempting to correct them.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Durg Chander was driving back home from work when he tried hard to remember what it was that he had forgotten. He finally gave up and reached home. His daughter came running to the porch eagerly and cried out, "Pa!" and after a pause: "Where's Ma?"

Each one of us sees only what we want to see, never what we ought to see!

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Sikar Shareef had asked his wife to courier a parcel. He came back home that evening and asked her if she had done it. She hadn't. He started, "This is so typical of you." The wife apologized, "Sorry dear..." Sikar continued, "What did you do the whole day long?" The wife started, "Actually..." Sikar said, "Alright, give me the parcel at least." The wife finally finished, "Actually, you forgot to put the address on it."

It is always good to patiently hear the story before pointing fingers. That little patience will save a lot of face.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Nitti Mudaliar came back from work and his wife decided to step out for dinner with a friend. The children were all playing and for the first time, Nitti was asked to get the children into their night suits and put them to sleep. His wife came back and asked if he had any trouble in doing it. Nitti explained, "Oh, only our cute little one - he babbled so much before I could finally get him through it." The wife peeped into the room and screamed, "Nitti! He is our neighbor's child!"

General awareness is very important, however caught up we may be in our own work.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Tinku Kishen's husband didn't come home for the day. The whole night, she sat anxiously waiting for him. The next day, she sent out telegrams to a few of his friends with a message: "Is he spending the night with you? Didn't come home last night." At lunch time, her husband came home with a perfectly legitimate excuse. However, all the friends she had sent out telegrams to replied: "Yes, he was with me."

If we live a transparent life, no one and nothing can betray us. It is only when we have swept things under the carpet that we might get double-crossed.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

The doctor examined Nithya Manu and told him, "Sir, you will be alright soon. Try to live more on greens." Manu took the prescription and said, "Alright, I will play more golf than usual then. It will help won't it?"

We all correctly misunderstand what is being told to us. That is why we need to be told things more than once and in different ways.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Ananda Pappaiah arrived at work looking very shabby. His colleague noticed it and asked him what happened. Pappaiah said, "Well, I went home early this morning after working through the night and as I was undressing, my wife woke up and mumbled that I was getting ready rather early. I had no other option; I put my clothes back on and came back to work."

When you are not open to logic and reasoning, you will drive people away from you.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Ram Gopal met up with a friend who asked him, "What has happened? We don't see you in the club at all these days." Gopal replied, "Yes, I have decided to spend the evenings staying at home....in ways my wife likes."

Most of us spend our lives trying to make others happy. This is alright if there is only joy and no silent suffering inside.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Neetu Patel was getting worried about her husband Pali arriving past midnight everyday from work. She tried telling him to change his work culture but saw no results. Finally one day, when he walked into the bedroom, she rolled over and asked, "Is that you Rohan?" The next day on, her husband came in early.

What words cannot achieve, intelligence can. Allow intelligence to blossom and you will need words no more.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Chanda Basu and his friend were discussing their respective bosses' behaviors. Chanda said, "When he is in a bad mood, I just turn a deaf ear to whatever he says." His friend replied, "Oh, when mine is in a bad mood, I listen to every word that he says. It helps later when he says something quite different."

Every opportunity presents itself equally to each one of us alike. How we use it is purely in our hands. We have no one to blame.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Ananda Pappaiah was asking his friend about his broken marriage. The friend told him that the divorce had been granted. He said, "My wife agreed to let me have our baby half of the time." Pappaiah said, "That's very nice of her. But why are you looking so exhausted?" The friend replied, "Well, she has the baby during the day and lets me have him during the nights."

Some people can see only their own convenience, never others', even in the context of love and kindness.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Boss Ananda was reviewing his new secretary. He told her, "Miss, you have a very neat appearance." The girl blushed. Boss said, "You have a pleasing voice, my customers have mentioned that to me." The girl was overwhelmed. Boss continued, "Now can we get down to your spellings and punctuation?"

Diplomacy can very well be applied if it is going to bring positive and harmless results.

Her second son woke up Nithya Kanthi every time he heard a noise in the night. He would think it was a burglar. Kanthi told him that burglars don't make a noise. After that, the child woke her up every time the night was very still.

Until man understands the truth in what is being told, he will continue to cling on to the words that he hears.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Neetu Patel and Pali Patel were fast asleep when a noise was heard downstairs. Neetu woke up Pali suggesting that there might be a burglar downstairs. Pali told her, "Be quiet, let us wait and see if he is able to open that window that was stuck ever since we painted the house."

There are multiple sides to anything that we see; each one sees what he wants to see.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Latur Singh and Sikar Shareef were catching up with old times. They spent the night together in the latter's house. Suddenly, they heard a noise beneath them downstairs. Latur froze while Sikar got out of bed and walked towards the door. Latur whispered, "Be careful, what are you going to do?' Sikar whispered back, "Lock the bedroom door."

Man lives his entire life in fear of death. All his fears are in some way connected to death. Meditation alone can help him out of this fear complex.

Gritty Gauri was very possessive of everything that came from her mother's house, which was virtually everything that she had in her house. She often reminded her husband that everything was her's. A burglar broke into their house one night and Gritty woke her husband up. She said, "Dear, there's a burglar in our house, please do something about it." He replied sleepily, "Oh, there's nothing of mine down there."

Enjoy everything by renouncing it! Only then can you enjoy to the maximum without fear of losing anything.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Sheikh Govinda had a doctor friend who advised him that he either stopped taking whiskey or took it only with hot water. Govinda told him that he wouldn't be able to get hot water from his wife for whiskey. The doctor said, "Tell her that you need it for shaving." A few days later, Govinda's wife visited the doctor and told him, "I am very worried about him doctor, he shaves five times a day."

If we are straight forward in our words and actions, we need not search for convoluted reasons to support them.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Tinku Kishen was listening excitedly while the crystal gazer was predicting her future. He told her slowly, "You are going to marry an extremely handsome..." Tinku's eyes almost popped out. The man continued, "...but very poor man." Tinku snapped: "Take another guess."

Most of us are not searching for the real answers, but for matching answers - matching what we have already formed inside us.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Be Blissful

September 30

Boss Ananda called for his new secretary and told her, "You have a pleasing manner, but I am concerned about your grammar and punctuation." The girl looked at him earnestly and replied, "Sir, I will try to improve my grammar but I have never been late to office till date."

You first need to know what it is that you don't know, then someone can help you!

Neetu Patel and Tinku Kishen were enjoying their evening gossip. Neetu casually remarked, "Wonder what men talk about when they meet up." Tinku replied, "Probably the same things as we do." Neetu exclaimed, "How awful...!"

Everything we say or do will seem perfect as long as we are not put through the process of getting it back in any form!

Be Blissful

Nitti Mudaliar was looking for a girl and he met a rather smart young lady whom he instantly liked. After secretly watching her for a few days, he proposed to her. She looked him down and said, "I believe in getting a sample before I go in for something." Nitti thought for a while and replied, "Well ma'am, I can't give you a sample, but I can give you plenty of references!"

A man's true character needs only a small dent in its ego to be revealed in all of its splendor!

Chanda Basu and his friend were chatting. Suddenly Chanda said, "You know, I had a dream last night that I was enjoying up to ten rounds of whiskey and still going strong!" His friend said, "Well that reminds me - last night I dreamt that I was with this most beautiful girl in an island by myself!" Chanda asked indignantly, "Why didn't you call me?" His friend replied, "Well, I called up and they said that you were immersed in whiskey!"

Wit is a by product of intelligence. It can do much from winning friends to saving face!

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Two Chinese employees were deciphering what Boss Ananda had said that day morning. One of them said, "You know he said that plan II was in the horizon. I looked up 'horizon' in the dictionary and it said that it is an imaginary line that keeps moving further as you approach it."

Procrastination has become our very nature. We make up for it with our words, that's all.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Haughty Ananda went to a Master out of curiosity. The Master welcomed him and spoke at length. He came back and told his friend, "You know, he told me to drop the smoking habit, so I decided to drop it." The friend was amazed at what an effect the Master had had on him. He asked, "You really dropped smoking?" Haughty replied, "Of course not, I dropped him."

We are ready to applaud the Truth only if it concurs with our own thinking. Else, we simply ignore it how many ever times and in how many ever ways it is given to us.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Nithya Ameeta asked her students if anyone would tell the story of how the monkeys crossed the river in the famous Indian epic Ramayana. One boy stood up and narrated the incident correctly. Ameeta applauded him and said, "I am happy that at least one boy has read the Ramayana!" The boy continued with an honest look, "I haven't read the Ramayana, I read this on the toffee bar's wrapper."

In Life, it is alright for each one to follow his own path, as long as the goal is the same!

Nithya Kanthi delivered a girl after six boys. Her husband and she went on a long celebration. Their friends came over and asked them, "Who does she look like? Mother or father?" The happy parents replied, "We don't really know; we haven't seen her face yet."

We continuously search for reasons to celebrate; that's when we miss the real celebration of Existence and its grandeur!

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Gritty Gauri found out that some of the second graders wove their own fairy tales at home about their classes and their teachers. She wrote in their diaries one day, "Attention Parents! Just like how we don't believe anything that your child says about home in school, we request you not to believe anything that the child says about school at home."

When you say something with the right logic and reasoning, it will always be broadly accepted.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Be Blissful

Nithya Twinkle was walking down a lane when she saw a man working hard at changing his car's tyre under the afternoon sun. When she passed by him she asked, "Changing the tyre?" The man replied, "No ma'am, I am just giving the car some rest by jacking it up."

People need our help, not our sympathy. Sympathy will only worsen and weaken the situation for the person receiving it.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Ananda Pappaiah was with his friend on the road when a procession went past. Ananda watched on while his friend took off his cap and paid respect. Ananda said to him, "Hey, that was a nice gesture paying your respects." The friend replied, "Well, all said and done, we would've been married 25 years coming Thursday."

When there is no love lost between two people, at least natural courtesy should prevail.

Latur Singh was a lawyer. A client stormed in one day with a bill. He asked him, "How is it that you have charged me with three visits? I have come to you only twice!" Latur replied firmly, "Sir, the third time, you came and put on the waiting room light and picked up your spectacles that you left behind."

Money matters no doubt; but a man's true character can be revealed in trifle money matters.

Sagar Pillai received a complaint from his son's school that he was hardly showing up for classes. Sagar told his son that evening, "You must not avoid going to classes. After all, only at this age you can learn, work hard and gain knowledge. How would it be if your text books came full of mistakes?" The boy replied, "I would blame the printer." Sagar's wife realized to her horror that Sagar already had a successor.

If you are intelligent, you will realize that most mistakes could have been averted if you had stepped in somewhere with a different move; you will then never blame others for anything.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Be Blissful

October 13

Nithya Twinkle was determined to join the Navy. She disguised herself as a male and successfully passed the tests and realized her wish. Her friend asked her, "But tell me, you will need to take a shower with the rest of them, is it not? Won't they find out?" Twinkle replied, "Of course they will; but who'll tell!"

It is in our own approach whether we are going to see a problem in a solution or a solution in a problem.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Little Nithya knew her father's latest furniture prices by heart. She ran to open the door and there stood a man asking for her dad. She told him, "He's not well at the moment, but if you have come for the queen size bed, it's 35,000 rupees." The man said, "Actually, I want to see your father." Little Nithya continued, "Hmm..the king size bed costs 45,000 rupees." The man said, "Thank you miss, but may I see your father please." Little Nithya didn't give up; she said, "The dressing table set costs 20,000 rupees." The man finally said, "Alright Miss, you are a smart girl, let me tell you what the matter is. I want to talk to him about my daughter who insists upon marrying his son." Little Nithya was stumped; she said, "Oh... I don't know how much he charges for my brother. You'd better meet him."

Children always persevere better than adults. Only we need to groom ourselves to be patient and give them a chance to.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Pali Patel received a paper at his office desk which he had earlier circulated to his colleagues. He noticed that a colleague not really connected with the matter had also signed the document. He wrote on the paper and sent it back, "Sir, this document does not require your approval. Kindly erase your initial and initial the erasure."

The most delicate of matters can be handled with wit and humour better than with military instructions!

Nithya Manu was appearing for an interview to get into the most esteemed business school in the country. The panel of interviewers sat opposite him. He was asked, "Would you like several easy questions or one difficult one?" Manu said, "One difficult one, Sir." The interviewer asked, "Which came first - the chick or the egg?" Manu was cornered but came back, "The egg sir." "How?" asked the questioner. Manu said, "Sorry Sir, but you said that you will ask only one difficult question!"

Lateral thinking can turn around any difficult situation. Lateral thinking is nothing but breaking free from our mental patterns and allowing fresh ideas to step in.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Sheikh Govinda and his friend were drinking to their hearts' content at the bar. Strange and funny stories emanated from them. Suddenly, the owner's cat came running and sat in the empty chair opposite them. Sheikh warned his friend, "Listen, you'd better go slow on those slimy cat stories."

It is imperative that we show concern for other animals and their sentiments. After all, this is what peaceful co- existence is all about.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Two days after Neetu Patel and Pali Patel got married, a terrible fight broke out between them. Pali was disgusted and he concluded, "I must say that men are fools to marry." Neetu shot back, "Think of the women - they have nothing else to marry!"

In a battle of words, the Truth can never surface, because it is a mere battle of words, not a battle for the Truth!

Ananda Pappaiah visited his nephew who was staying with an aunt and attending college. Pappaiah had also attended the same college staying at the aunt's house. He walked into his nephew's room and felt nostalgic. He saw the book rack and commented, "Same old book rack." He walked around and saw the clothesline and remarked, "Same old clothesline." He opened the cupboard and saw a girl standing there. The nephew said, "My project-mate." Pappaiah walked on saying, "Yes, same old story."

Somehow, man feels comfortable in seeing history repeating itself. There is a certain concurrence inside him with it, even if it is not appropriate.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Worry Ananda visited the doctor and told him, "Doctor, I am so terribly afraid of the sound of crackers. I feel silly about it; can you prescribe something for me?" The doctor told him, "Just clap both your ears with your hands and the sound will not disturb you as much. That's what I do all the time."

An ordinary man can guide you only through his limited intelligence. A Master can guide you through His infinite intelligence!

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Tinku Kishen tried telling her husband that he should stop coming home drunk in the night. He never changed his ways. She finally told him that if he came home drunk, he would not be let into the house. The next day, he came drunk and Tinku stuck to her decision. He screamed from outside, "If you don't let me in, I will go out and scream to our neighbors that you are not the first lady I slept with." Tinku screamed back, "And I will come behind you and scream that you are not the only one to do that."

In the eye of society, if you are not alone in the wrong, you become right! Such is the lop-sided judgment through which it sees man.

Latur Singh decided to participate in a debate. The topic was 'polygamy'. He had no clue as to what it meant. A fellow student told him, "Plural marriage". He showed no signs of understanding. A junior shouted from behind, "Having more than one wife!" Latur's face lit up and he spontaneously started talking.

Man somehow seems to revel in anything complex, when it can be made much simpler. How much easier life would become if things were kept simple!

Little Nithya told her mother about how in her school, the teacher said that the person who stood up and admitted that they had never lied to their parents about anything would get a silver brooch pinned on their dress. She told her mother, "Would you believe it? Not even one student stood up!" Her mother asked, "Why didn't you stand up?" Nithya replied, "I wanted to, but I would have looked awful with that brooch pinned on me."

Man easily compromises the Ultimate Truth for lesser things. This is how he stalls his inward journey, time and again.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Little Ananda went to the temple with his mother to attend the customary Monday discourse. Her mother was as always weary of him getting restless. That day however, she noticed that he sat with his hands clasped and eyes fixed on them throughout the discourse. At the end of it, she whispered to him, "Good boy! You've been really listening today.' He whispered back, "Ma, that fly flew in and out of my clasped hands thirty times!"

Any task done with total commitment and concentration becomes a meditation by itself. It solidifies something somewhere inside us.

Nithya Kanthi was having her friend over when her husband came home drunk as usual, supported by two of his friends. He stood at the entrance, saw the two ladies and staggered up the stairs to his room. Her friend remarked, "Sad isn't it?" Kanthi replied, "Yes it's sad, he never greets people."

We surrender so easily to life's patterns that we lose our sensitivity in the whole process.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Tinku Kishen told her friend, "You know I've finally found a military man whom I am going to marry." The friend excitedly asked, "what do you like about him?" Tinku replied, "He cooks so well, he makes the bed beautifully, he polishes his own shoes, what more...?" Her friend got concerned and asked, "Are you really going to ask him to do all that?" Tinku replied cheerfully, "Hey! he's used to taking orders!"

When a relationship is bound by love, it never falls apart; but when it is bound by convenience, there is bound to be a rift sometime.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Nithya Madhu went to her doctor and asked, "Do you think you can do a hysterectomy on me?" The doctor was shocked and exclaimed, "But, you are in perfect condition! Why would you want me to do a hysterectomy?" Madhu replied, "I am just not able to take part in the conversation in the new ladies' club down my lane."

Popularity is a natural thing that happens to you when you flower from within. Sadly, man thinks he can buy it off.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Neetu Patel was raising her first child. Every time he fell and hurt himself, she would create a big fuss in the house and rush him to the hospital. Soon, she became mother of three. One day, her third son fell down and came in with a bruised knee. She continued her knitting and asked, "What have you done to yourself?"

The world remains unchanged, only man's perception of it changes as he gets wiser.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Sheikh Govinda was backing his car when he banged into a parked car. The policeman walked up to him and gave him an accident report for him to fill out. There was a question that read, "How do you think the other person could have avoided the accident." Govinda wrote, "He could have parked elsewhere."

Wise is the man who accepts that the mistake lies entirely with him.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Barsi Rajan walked into a florist's and asked what flowers they had that could be made into a bouquet. "Roses 5 colors, lilies, orchids and ferns" replied the florist in a hoarse voice. "You've got laryngitis?" asked Barsi. She replied, "No, only what I've just told you."

There are two types in ignorance - ignorance of worldly knowledge and ignorance of knowledge of the Self. Both can be destroyed with intelligence.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Nithya Ameeta visited the farmlands to do her project on farmers and their lives. She visited a farmer's wife and asked her what her routine was. The lady eagerly explained, "I get up at 5:30, milk the cows, clean the front yard, boil the milk..." and she went on and on while Ameeta kept pace with her in taking down notes. She finally asked her, "What do you do in your free time?" The lady thought for a while and said, "Well, er... I go to the bathroom."

Work spares us from great evils like boredom, vice and needs. Happy are the ones who are in love with their work!

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Ananda Pappaiah sat on the chair and felt his son's spectacle bending under his weight. He scolded him, "I've told you so many times not to leave your glasses on the chair!" His second son came running in and shouted, "Pa, Ma ran over my bike in the porch!" The first son asked him, "Who asked you to leave your bike in the porch?"

There are always two sides to an issue. A closed mind sees only one side.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Three monkeys found a mango but couldn't decide how to divide it. They decided that they will plant it and eat the fruits that the tree bears. The first monkey took charge of watering it everyday, the second took charge of putting manure for it and the third took the role of watching over it. Months passed and there was no sign of the tree. They came together again to investigate the matter. The first monkey claimed that he was watering diligently. The second swore that he applied manure everyday without fail. The third monkey said, "I have been keeping a close watch over it. In fact everyday I dig in to see if it is alright!"

Any process takes time to give results. The impatient mind doesn't allow the process to happen and hence not only misses the results but also blames the process.

Be Blissful

Sagar Pillai visited Texas. He stopped outside a farm house and asked for water. The Texan offered him water and made polite conversation while he drank. Sagar told him that he had 10 acres of land in the front and back of his house. The Texan gave a silent laugh. Sagar asked him how much land he owned. The Texan replied, "I get into the car in the morning at one end of my farmlands and start driving and reach the other end at night time." Sagar said, "I too had a car like that!"

We always perceive the Truth through our ignorance. We therefore often miss it and grasp its shadows instead.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

A little mink died and went to heaven. St. Peter was surprised to see him. He told him, "You're the first mink we're having here. Ask for a wish and we will grant it for you." The mink said, "I want a coat made of all the Hollywood movie stars."

Silent suffering is bound to explode in some form or the other. It is a question of time, that's all.

Neetu Patel noticed that her third son's appetite was increasing by the day. He came home one day and said, "Ma, the sandwiches are just not enough. Please keep some more." She kept 6 instead of 4 sandwiches. The next day he came back and said that he wanted more. She kept 8 sandwiches. The following day, he asked for still more. Neetu finally bought a long bread roll, slit it and filled it up. That day, he came back and said, "Ma, you're back to one sandwich!"

Man is so obsessed with quantity that he totally misses the quality!

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Nithya Kanti decided to take her students to the village for a two-day stint. In the village, she made them sit along with the students there under a tree and gave them common questions to answer. They answered and gave her back the papers. One question was, "If a cow gave 5 litres of milk in x days, how many litres would she give in a week?" Apart from wrong answers, she found that the two groups produced two different answers as majority. She pondered for a while on this distinctly different majorities and then discovered the reason. The city students had taken 5 days to a week!

Our conditioning influences curbs our intelligence. We need to break our conditioning for our intelligence to explode in all directions.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Little Nithya went over to her father's farm to spend the weekend. The farmer's daughter showed her around. They came past a herd of cows and the girl remarked, "These are all Jersey cows." Little Nithya's eyes widened as she asked, "You know them even without their license plates?"

A cross-culture can show us how limited we are in our perceptions. It can awaken the need for our intelligence to grow.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Little Ananda and Little Nithya were playing together one evening. They had a toffee bar with them which they were supposed to share. Ananda offered to get a knife from his mother's kitchen but cautioned Nithya, "Don't lick the bar while I'm away." Nithya nodded. Ten minutes went past and Ananda didn't return. Nithya looked longingly looked at the bar and took it near her nose to smell it. "Don't!" cried Ananda emerging from a nearby bush, " If you do, I won't go to get the knife!".

Man expects to be trusted in no time but thinks a long while before trusting others!

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Neetu Patel was complaining to her cousin about her husband's tantrums. She told her, "I am losing weight just co-existing with the man." Her friend asked, "Why not just leave him?" Neetu replied, "I am just waiting to reach the normal weight for my height, then I will quit."

Suffering never happens without our silent consent.

Boss Ananda was spending lighter moments with his employees in the office garden. He told the men to queue up in front of the building and enter the building one by one. He challenged that he would be able to tell which of them was married and which ones not. They did so and Boss was right with all except one. They asked him what the trick was and he replied, "The married ones enter after wiping their feet on the mat!"

There are only two or three of life's stories that happen repeatedly and that is why it is so easy to predict the patterns of Life.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Nithya Ameeta was shooting for a film and causing trouble for the director. She insisted that she be given real wine instead of water with food-colouring. The director tried his best to tell her that he would not be able to afford such demands every time from her. Ameeta stood her ground. Finally the director asked her, "Ma'am, for the poison scene, shall we get some real poison?"

An unreasonable attitude merely exposes our lack of intelligence.

Worry Ananda was looking very depressed. His uncle noticed his woebegone face and enquired what the matter was. Worry replied, "Today, Philip told me on my face that I am nothing but a weakling." "Don't worry Worry," his uncle consoled him, "Philip has no opinion of his own. He simply repeats whatever everyone says."

It takes extra intelligence to hide the Truth; The Truth is so all pervasive!

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Nithya Twinkle worked all day sending out letters to customers. At the end of it she was thankful it was over and left for home. On the way, she realized that she had forgotten to shut down her computer at work. She called up her office and her manager picked up the phone. She requested him to shut down her computer. Her manager said that he would do it for her. Twinkle hung up saying, Thank you Sir, Your's truly."

We always carry the past in our mind; that is why our mind fails to switch instantly to the present.

Tinku Kishen went to the beauty parlour and enquired on weight reducing treatments. She told them, "I just have to reduce my weight. My husband's given me a wonderful gift and I am not able to get into it." The girl at the parlour said, "Don't worry, we will get you into terrific shape and you can very soon wear your wonderful dress." Tinku exclaimed, "It's not a dress, it's a car!"

For the inner world, silence will do; for the outer world, explicit words are needed, else we will be misconstrued easily!

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Chanda Basu wanted to impress upon his students that one should know the workings behind basic things in everyday life. He explained, "Take for example the light bulb and the switch, how many of us know the working behind it?" One student promptly replied, "Sir, what is there in this? We press the switch and the bulb burns!"

When we fail to allow intelligence to take over us, we won't even know what we don't know! Intelligence will help us to at least know what it is that we don't know.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Ananda Twinkle was visiting her dentist-boyfriend on the sly. He told her, "I think you had better stop coming to see me, I'm afraid that my wife might come to know of our relationship." Twinkle asked, "But we have been going about it so discreetly all these months, how would she find out?" He replied, "Dear, but you are down to your last tooth!"

Mere lust can distort our intelligence and awareness. Until awakening happens, the distortion will never even be perceived!

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Little Ananda had a pet parrot which he had trained to talk in five languages. Little came home after school one day to find his parrot in a brand new cage. Horrified, he screamed at the new servant maid whom he assumed was responsible for it. He shouted at her, "Why did you put the parrot in the cage? He is very well trained and can speak up to 5 languages!" The maid replied, "But Sir, he could've told me that!"

When we are never able to see ourselves in the wrong, there will never be dearth of excuses for us.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Sikar Shareef was racing down the highway in his car when his friend accompanying him commented, "Looks like we've lost our way, Sikar. I'd suggest that we look up a map before proceeding any further." Sikar shouted out excitedly, "How does it matter? We're making great time!"

When man gets caught in the fury of his senses, he loses sight of his goal. It is then that he needs reminders.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Nithya Ameeta dressed her little son up and sent him for the annual day function at school. She told him, "If you don't behave yourself, your class teacher has told me that she will send you back that very moment." The child nodded and went to school. Barely 15 minutes later, he came back. Ameeta saw him walk in and cried out, "I knew it! In spite of my warning, you misbehaved." The child didn't say a word but looked very angry. Ameeta continued, "Tell me, what did you do this time?" The child looked at her and said, "Ma, the function is only tomorrow."

Our preconceptions constrict our perceptions. We need to drop them to see ourselves expanding.

Nithya Pathni and Ananda Pathi were sleeping when suddenly airplanes could be heard bombing the place. Nithya Pathni jumped out of bed and made for the door. Ananda Pathi started searching for something in the dark. "What is it?" screamed Pathni. "I am searching for my teeth!" he cried. "Never mind your teeth," she cried, "the airplanes are dropping bombs not food packets!"

If we live fully in the present, we will be ever alert and spontaneous in any situation.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Ananda Pappaiah ran a cosmetic shop. One day, he was sitting on the beach when a Chinese girl came and sat next to him and smiled. He smiled back. The girl drew a picture of groundnuts on the sand. Ananda deciphered that she wanted the groundnuts that were being sold on the beach and bought some for her. Next, she drew a picture of a horse. Ananda arranged for the pony ride on the beach. She then drew a picture of lips. Ananda got up and walked away. He suspected that the girl had 'extra sensory perception' by which she knew that he owned a cosmetic shop.

Man has honed his skills in seeing complexity in everything that is straightforward! Much of his anxiety is rooted in this capacity of his.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Sheikh Govinda went to London for a holiday. He was taking an evening walk with an English friend, enjoying the pretty walkways. Suddenly the friend remarked, "Spring in the air!" Sheikh asked, "Why should I?"

It takes intelligence to grasp the truth, else we will grasp only its shadows.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Boss Ananda was on a two-day business trip and checked into his company guest house. The housekeeper's son helped him take the luggage to the room. Boss tipped him with five rupees. The boy took the money and murmured as he walked away, "Even his employees who come give me ten rupees." Boss shouted from behind him, "That's why they are still employees!"

A man who squanders money remains in desperate need of it.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Little Nithya was watching a movie with her mother. The hero and heroine were having an argument. The hero suddenly slapped the latter and she started crying. Nithya shouted out amidst the silence, "But, why didn't she slap him back like you do Ma!"

Children can speak the truth like no adult can, because they are still so simple.

Pali Patel visited the doctor with ill health. The doctor examined him and sat down to explain. Pali told him, "Doctor, please don't scare me with your technical terms; just tell me in plain English." The doctor said, "Ok, you're just plain lazy." Pali murmured, "Hmmm...ok, tell me the technical name now, I need to tell my family."

We often think we are fooling others when in reality we are always fooling ourselves. Awaken, before you are fully deceived!

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

In the bulletin board of his college, a notice read: "Any senior found ragging the juniors will be fined an amount of rupees one thousand." Ram Gopal read it and inserted a comma in it and it thereafter read: "Any senior found ragging, the juniors will be fined an amount of rupees one thousand."

Pauses and periods are punctuation marks when used correctly not only change the meaning of sentences but also that of our lives.

Tinku Kishen joined the hostel at her college. The orientation session took place the day after she joined. The warden spoke: "Be very clear: Any boy or girl found in the other's hostel will be fined hundred rupees the first time and two hundred rupees the second time." Tinku put up her hand and asked, "Is there any season pass?"

There need be no rules if every man lived by the right scruples and logic. The earth then would be truly paradise!

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Sagar Pillai was making arrangements for his son's first stage show. He told his relatives that if his son's show was a hit, he would treat them for dinner at the restaurant down the lane. The show took place and it was a terrible flop. Sagar hurried to the restaurant to cancel the order. He found his uncle and nephew already there eating dinner. He exclaimed, "I said, only if the show was a hit!" They answered back, "Well, we liked it!"

The terms of any agreement have to be very explicit, else unpleasant surprises may follow!

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Sikar Shareef was put in charge of a prison. His immediate senior warned him to be careful about the men inside the cells as each of them had quite a history behind them. "Don't Worry," said Sikar, "If they misbehave, out they go!"

Rules need to be adapted carefully to bring the desired results; else they will misfire.

Moti Ankur was telling his friend how important it is to keep a pet dog physically fit. He told him, "I take my dog for a jog every morning for half an hour." The friend was not quite convinced about Moti doing this himself everyday. One day, the friend was jogging when a car passed by him rather slowly. There was Moti at the wheel looking intently at the side view mirror and behind his car was the dog jogging.

Ironically, we all the time apply our wisdom to others, never to ourselves!

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Latur Singh was an actor and specialized in playing a woman. He used to walk in and out of the house in various feminine costumes and wigs. The old man who lived next door watched him regularly. One day, he was weeding the garden when the old man came up to him and asked, "How do you manage so many women without your wife knowing?" Sikar laughed and later told his wife about it. She asked him, "Didn't you tell him the truth?" He replied, "Why forego my reputation!"

Our self esteem and self confidence are both built on others' opinion of us, never on our own. That is why we need to work hard on maintaining them.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Churu Kiran lived in a flat. After he came back from office one day, he put on the music on full volume and settled down in his easy chair. Soon, he heard a pounding on the door and he got up and answered it. It was his neighbor. He stuck his head inside and asked, "Can you hear my television?" Churu replied, "No, I can't." "Well," said the neighbor, "Neither can I."

It becomes a shame when others point out our insensitivities.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Neetu Patel called up the real estate agent and asked him to look out for a piece of land. She told him, "Preferably a square piece, with a pond and a brook, and with wild flowers growing." The agent paused for a while and told her, "Ma'am, we deal with stretches of land, not stretches of paradise!"

Man searches for paradise outside of him and almost never finds it because it is inside him and he is blissfully unaware of it.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Nithya Kanthi was watching her husband at the party. He was holding a conversation with a very attractive girl for almost twenty minutes. Later that evening, she remarked, "I was very impressed watching you at the party." He asked, "About being able to hold the girl's attention for twenty minutes?" Kanthi replied, "No, about being able to hold your stomach in for twenty minutes."

Man expends his energy and time as dictated by his intelligence. The more intelligent, the more useful are his energy and time.

Haughty Ananda lost all his wealth in gambling and got reduced to a pauper. One day, he went to a roadside hotel and sat at the table for breakfast. The waiter came to take orders and to Haughty's surprise, it was his old friend who had been as rich as Haughty was. He exclaimed, "You serve as a waiter in this sort of a hotel!" The man replied, "I'm only a waiter, I don't eat here."

A foolish man doesn't let go of his ego even when all his other defenses are taken away.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Bhilai Mansoor checked into a hotel room and ordered for a vegetable dish and a particular newspaper. To his fury, both his orders appeared different to what he had asked for. He called up the reception. A girl's voice answered and he told her the matter. She said, "Now, you've just checked into the hotel, been given something to eat and a paper to read while you eat. Life has been kind hasn't it?" Bhilai meekly agreed and disconnected the line.

Gratitude needs to become our very nature; Life will then become a joyful experience!

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Nithya Pathni came back from a long holiday and discovered her house in a mess. Her husband had apparently been too busy at work. She went about setting right the house and finally washed his car as well. She came in and announced to him, "The woman who loves you the most has cleaned your car tonight!" He looked up eagerly and asked, "My mom's here?"

Our very Being has to exude love, only then can it be felt by one and all alike!

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Nithya Madhu went to a nursery looking for a tree for her backyard. She told the girl, "I want a tree that will not spread too much, that will give shade, that will not shed its leaves and that will allow the sun to filter through it." The girl at the nursery thought for a while and said, "Ma'am, what you want is an umbrella."

Most often, others are able to read our desires clearly because while we are caught up in them, they see it objectively. Distancing ourselves from our desires helps in understanding them clearly.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Bhilai Mansoor took the school children out to see the sunset. They watched spell bound as the sky changed from one colour to another like a painting in progress. At the end of it, Bhilai told them, "Now, let us give a clap to the artist behind the whole thing." The children thought for a moment and then joyfully clapped!

The least we can do is hail the glory of Existence!

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Chanda Basu went to see his boss. The boss's secretary told him, "Sorry Sir, the boss is out." Chanda said, "But I saw him through the glass door as I was coming." The secretary replied, "He saw you too."

We need to understand fully what is actually being conveyed to us before asking foolish questions.

It was winter time and the snow had started. Little Ananda went up to his teacher and told her, "Ma'am, this is first time I am seeing snow. I am writing a poem on it." The teacher encouraged him. A couple of days later, word got around to her that Little had a lot of trouble with the snow. The next time she saw him in school and asked him if she could see his poem. He said to her, "I've torn the poem."

Life offers endless adventures to man! Whether we take it as an adventure or as an inconvenience depends entirely on our perception of it.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Ananda Pappaiah told his Grandma one day, "Ma, you have lived frugally all your life at the expense of your health. You are old now and I have calculated your wealth. You have money for a comfortable living up to 110 years of age." His Grandma asked, "What will I do after that?"

The future is wider than vision and has no end; Planning needs to be done for just a few years ahead everytime.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Sheikh Govinda and Latur Singh went fishing. They sat with their rods in water and had a bet about who was going to get the first catch. Sheikh felt a tug in his line, got excited and tumbled into the water. Latur declared, "If you are going in to fetch the fish, I am calling off the bet."

When intelligence fails us, the gravity of the situation fails us too.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Gritty Gauri was watching as the men packed her house articles. She saw one of them handling her antique vase and warned him, "Please be careful, that is over a hundred years old." The man looked at her and said, "Don't worry ma'am, I will handle it like it's brand new!"

We never see things as they are. We always see them as we are.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Nithya Manu got a call from the modeling school requesting him to deliver 150 cups of coffee mousse that day evening. Manu told the caller, "Madam, this is too short a notice for the quantity involved." There was a pause at the other end after which the lady asked, "You really want to miss the opportunity of seeing 150 beautiful women in one go?" The mousse was promptly delivered.

Man needs to follow his senses and not his sense organs to reach the right goals.

Ananda was waiting for the bus when a girl came up to him and asked him the directions to get to a particular building. Ananda pointed to a tall building amongst a cluster of them and said, "Can you see that tall building there? That's the one." The girl told him, "Sir, I have seen the building from many angles since morning; I need the directions to get to it."

There are many people to show you the goal, but it takes a Master to show you the path!

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Little Nithya never learnt her lessons and performed very poorly in all her tests. Her mother told her one day, "Listen Nithya, if you actually sit and go through all your lessons properly, you will be able to do well in your tests." Nithya took her advice and diligently studied for three days before her next test. She came back from the exam and told her mother, "Ma, I need not have studied so hard, the test was so easy!"

Surmounting difficulties does not cause the real growth; realizing how we surmounted them causes the real growth.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Pali Patel noticed that his pet dog was looking very depressed. He understood that the dog's bark had weakened and hence none of the visitors showed any of the former signs of fear, and this was causing depression in him. Pali arranged for a microphone with an amplifier to be installed inside the kennel. The dog's spirit lifted that same day!

How will we survive if we look to others for strength? We need to survive purely on our own inner strength and intelligence.

Tinku Kishen stepped out to do some shopping, leaving behind the mending work that she was doing on the sofa. Her husband saw it and decided to finish it for her. He did a perfect job of it. Tinku returned from her shopping. The following day she asked, "So who came in yesterday while I was away?"

If we don't drop our preconceived notions, the people around us may drop us!

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Neetu Patel went to a shoe store and tried on 10 pairs of shoes and concluded that none of them was the right fit. Finally, the salesman got her the eleventh pair and watched with bated breath as she tried them on. Neetu tried them on and said, "This fits too well, I wonder if this is the right size."

The best eludes one who is determined not to recognize it.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Nithya Madhu was shopping for dresses. She carried four dresses and walked to the trial room to find it locked. The girl at the shop told her that they close the trial rooms 15 minutes before close of shop. To the girl's surprise, Madhu heaved a sigh of relief and said, "You've just saved me 5000 rupees!"

Even though we know the Truth, we perceive it better when we hear it from others.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Durg Chander purchased a new car and went off on his first ride. On and on he went, mile after mile through the city. People watched in admiration. The car finally came to a stop after colliding with a tree. A stunned passerby enquired of him, "What's wrong with you? Don't you know how to drive properly?" "Of course I do!" cried Durg, "I only don't know how to stop!"

So, would you say that Durg was driving the car or being driven by it? Before you point a finger at him, remember that you are driving a vehicle which you don't know how to stop - your MIND!

Bhilai Mansoor was warned not to take his car to a particular area as every car was being broken into. Bhilai went all the same, parked his car and pasted a paper on it that read: "Nothing worth picking up inside." He came back after a couple of hours to find the quarter glass smashed. There was a remark added to his note that read: "True"

The hardest but surest way is to learn from one's own experience. Of course, one needs to learn from the first experience itself!

Chanda Basu was part of a music group and sang on stage. He sported a black and a red wig alternatively for each of his songs. During the intermission, the show director told him, "Sir, you would have to wear only the red wig for the remaining part of the show." Chanda asked him why. He replied, "The people like the red haired one's voice a lot better than the black one's."

We need to drop the comparing attitude to be able to see things as they are. Our mind is so caught up in comparison that it misses the actual quality of what it sees.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Latur Singh was alone in the house when the doorbell rang and a saleswoman stood selling dinner sets. She took out the knife set to show to him but accidentally cut her finger and caused profuse bleeding. Latur gave her first aid and sent her away. A few minutes another lady came in selling the same things. Latur told her, "Just now there was someone here selling these items. In fact, this is her blood here at the doorstep." The lady beat a hasty retreat.

When two people relate from different wavelengths, confusions and misunderstanding are bound to prevail. At least, they should strive to clear them instead of shying away.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Neetu Patel and Pali Patel were opening their wedding anniversary gifts. Neetu would exclaim for every item, "We could use these in our bedroom", or "We could display these in our drawing room." She opened a large gift box. It had a vacuum cleaner in it. "Pali," she said, "look what you've got."

When pure love blossoms from within, there will be only unconditional giving and compassion. Meditation is the key to this.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Sheikh Govinda stopped by at a pump and explained that he was penniless, but badly needed fuel to get to his house. The manager took pity on him and agreed to fill in a few liters. Govinda asked, "Can you give me the money instead? The pump across the road is cheaper."

Existence will shower unconditionally on us if we understand and accept all of it with unconditional gratitude.

Little Ananda earned his pocket money by delivering newspapers. He asked a customer if he would like to renew his subscription for the newspaper. The man said, "No, I don't get the time to read the paper and anyway I take it straight from the porch to the garbage can." Little thought for a while and suggested, "I can deliver it straight to garbage can."

When we fail to see things from the receiving end, we turn dangerously insensitive to other people and their needs.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Mansoor Bhilai was celebrating his 100th birthday. Amongst the birthday wishes, he received a greeting from his friend who was 95 years old. Mansoor exclaimed: "Oh my God! Is he still alive?"

We need to start seeing ourselves and others with the same eye and the same perspective. Only then have we matured in our perception.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Sikar Shareef was suffering from shock and panic and started running towards the rear while a battle was underway. After some time, he was spotted by an officer who asked him, "Don't you know there is a big battle going on up-front? What are you doing here?" Shareef didn't answer. "Speak up man!" cried the officer. "Do you know who I am? I'm your general!" "Good heavens!" cried Shareef. "Am I that far back?"

Our actions should speak for us, not our words. Often, words become poor substitutes for missing action.

- Paramahamsa Sri Nithyananda

Be Blissful

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