Transparency in relationships
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Tues March 27, 2012
Question: should I tell about my wild past to my spouse?
Understand, whatever you are carrying as past is not even your past. It is the past of the immature version of you.
After every year, a matured version of you is taking birth. The past of your immature version is not your past. So understand, when it is not even your past, what is there to talk about with your fiancée or spouse?
People want to know how much they should tell their spouse or fiancée about their wild past.
Ask him or her first if they want to know. Can they digest it?
You may want to share about
your wild past because you feel
that honesty and transparency
are important in your
relationship. But the other
person may be afraid of losing all
his romance for you if he comes
to know about your wild past!
He may be afraid that he cannot
accept you if he knows about
your wild past.
Most men and women really do not want to know the other person's wild past. If they want to know, they may be enjoying your wild past as pornography! Your revelation of your wild past only has a pornographic effect.
You need to know all the past engrams only when your purpose is to raise the person to give enlightenment. So when enlightenment is not involved, the other person does not need to know your whole past.
I tell you, even you don’t know your whole past! Even you fall into guilt with your past. What is your past? Many of the things you dealt with in the past are with your low intelligence. Now they are not even your past, because you are not the same person. Then why do you want to repeat that story to your spouse? Actually, if you are really honest and transparent, you will not talk about your immature past as your past and force it on your spouse or fiancé. You should be mature enough to tell him transparently about how mature you are now, and he should be able to see that.