The Perfect Witness🔗

I wish to do so many things, but even before I start I hear voices saying I am not good enough.

I may still try, but with an attitude, with a degree of carefulness, a bunch of caution, timidly looking over my shoulder.

Why am I so afraid to try?' I asked Him.

'Ah!' Master said, 'You are still clutched. You still clutch to your fear, joy, expectation, image, or even love. You are clutching onto to something. Let it go. Liberate yourself. Be free. Life is freedom. Dive in. Fall free."

'Will you be there to hold me, Master?' I ask.

'When you fall free, you develop the wings of confidence. You will soar in joy. You don't need me to baby you anymore.' He said.

'Master! I have no wings! And I have chronic myopia!' I plead.

The prescription doesn't alter.

'Excellent! The blinder you to the physical world, the better it gets. That's all there is to that.'

'Master!' I plead. Master pays no heed.

I asked. I sought counsel. It meant that I was ready to break from old patterns at some level. Ah, that is so, so, so, hard. The old way, although it brought me no results, was familiar.

Yeah! Dive! You asked for it! I dive from the cliff. Panic floods me. I have nothing to hold on! I scream, but it chokes me into silence.

'Chicken,' a voice mocks me.

"Is someone watching me?' Instantly I steady myself. Someone is watching. Someone is a witness to this plight of mine. Maybe help is on the way. May be there's nothing more to it. I no longer feel concerned at falling.

I'm keen to figure out who is spying on me.

'Hello!' I call out, my voice no more than a sharp in-drawn breath. I hear no answer. I see no eyes. But oh, I feel, I feel strongly that someone is watching me. Who is watching this body fall?

'Simply look within,' says the guiding voice of the Master.

'Are you my witness?' I ask. Silence greets me. This silence blows me away. I fly.

'He promised me' I thought, 'this is what I get to be free. I should be determined and continue until the end.'

I float within and without, in and out. My silence will be my only witness; an eternally watchful witness. Is this silence different from my Master?

'Is this what You mean when You say the experience, experience and experienced merge into one?' I think and ask.

Only laughter greets me, 'words just words. Go beyond them.'

'Have you woken up from your fantasies? Have you finished building your castles? What did you build them with?" asked Master. He laughed hard at the look of shock on my face.

Speechless, I search within; strange, but there had been no fantasies; there wasn't even a 'me'. In some sense I seem to have disappeared for a while. Or perhaps, I was the witness myself.

I shake my head in confusion. 'I felt I was falling, but there was no fear. I seemed happy I was falling. There was nothing to think about.'

'Hold the memory of this experience, but move on' said Master.

And so I move on, from one experience to another, neither expecting nor fearing, bust being. I don't even care if He is there or not to hold me. But then, I know deep within, that I cannot fall without Him.