88. How far away is the present moment?🔗

When you hear this title, you may be thinking, 'What kind of a question is this? How can the present moment be far away?' But if you look deeply, you will see that it depends on how long it takes you to get to the present moment. If it takes you twelve years, like it took Buddha, then the present moment is very far away! Please understand: I am not saying that Buddha was not a good seeker. In fact, he was an extraordinary seeker. That is why it took him twelve years to exhaust his energy; to exhaust his self-effort and fall into the experience.

All the meditation techniques, all the rituals, everything I give you are nothing but different ways to exhaust your self-effort. When these techniques are done in the right spirit, the right understanding, they will take you closer to the experience. But if you are just following some rituals and techniques, doing some idol worship, without understanding the true spirit, without understanding the true purpose, without understanding the truth behind, you can be just stuck for lifetimes. Very beautifully Shankara says, 'kalpakala paryantam' - you can be stuck for ages.

Even a strong being like Buddha got caught in this. Buddha was not an ordinary man. He was a prince. He had a kingdom under his control. He had a loving wife, a son, a palace where all the possible luxuries were available. It is not easy to renounce all this and become a monk. But Buddha did it.

It is very easy to talk and think about enlightenment, not to do what is needed for it! Sometimes people ask me, 'Swamiji, can I remain at home and still get enlightened?' I cannot tell straightaway, 'No, give up everything, go to the Himalayas and meditate.' It will be too much for them! Even when I tell people to drop smoking, they usually drop me! It is not easy for people to give up everything.

But Buddha was a being who would not compromise with the truth. He was all out. He knew that this has to be achieved, this has to be done, and he left everything. It was not only his first priority, it was his only priority. But even a man like Buddha wasted twelve years in this deergha kalaha.

One day suddenly he started thinking deeply, 'What am I missing? Day in and day out I am sitting, sitting, sitting, and meditating, but nothing is happening. What am I missing?' Actually, if you are a professional seeker, you can understand what I am saying! This sutra is for the highly evolved seekers.

Buddha started looking inside, 'What is going on? I am meditating whole day. How is my mind still alive? How is it surviving?' That is when he suddenly realized the game that his mind was playing with him; the hope that the practice will end at some time. The hope of change was keeping his mind alive.

Buddha understood, 'This one idea is responsible for my continuous

struggle.' Then he decided, 'No more. No more change. No question of long time. I am going to do this forever. The pressure of this practice is going to be on me forever. This is going to be my life.' That is where the real deerhga kala happened in him. Oh God! Especially a person like Buddha - when he decides, he just decides. He is not going to play games. He means it.

Suddenly his mind got completely frightened, 'Oh God, what happened? Now he says forever! So he is going to do it forever. So there is no hope, there is no change. There is no possibility for the future. This pressure of meditation is going to be there on me forever.'

So, naturally it just came back to the present moment, because there is nothing to search for in the future. It just came back to the present moment, and the practice ended, the practice ended.

Anybody wants to end your spiritual practice, all you need to do is decide strongly that you are going to practice forever, that's all. It looks very paradoxical. Decide you are going to do it forever. There is no change. There is no gap. There is no getting up. There is no break. This is going to be your life. Suddenly, the practice will end. It will end. This is the one and only way if you want to end your practice. Till you decide you are going to be doing this forever, you can never end the practice.

All the meditation techniques, all the rituals, everything is nothing but different ways to exhaust my self-effort.