50. Connect to Yourself first🔗

I have one more story for you about absentmindedness. It is my favorite subject, because I suffer with this problem with all my disciples! I can say that this is one of the obvious, visible gaps between the disciple and the master. I don't mean it only in the spiritual sense; it defines the gap between a follower and a leader in any field. Please understand: anybody can do 80% of the work. Only the person who is aware enough to do the last 20% without absentmindedness becomes a leader. I am defining a leader! Anyone can run 80% of the race. The one who stretches and runs the last 20% is the leader.

So I have a story about absentmindedness: An elderly widow and a widower had been dating for five years. He finally asked her to marry him.' I must stop right here to tell you - I pick up all these jokes from the American books when I come here, because Indians can't relate with many of the jokes I tell here. Even the last joke about the professor missing his house - nobody will understand it in India, because in India, if you miss your house, anybody on the street will tell you where you are living! The whole street knows who are all living on that street! It is like all the people on that street are cousins, and practically the whole village are relatives, directly or indirectly. Kids will go into any house and eat anywhere and sleep anywhere. Once in a week, on Friday, when they are all supposed to go to the temple, they take attendance and find out who is where, that's all!

So, in India, they cannot relate to jokes like the professor missing his house on the same street.

Even in this joke – the moment I say, ‘elderly widow and widower, dating for five years’ – they can’t understand! This itself will be a joke for them! They don’t need any other punchline! In India, only in modern times they even think of remarriage – and that too only if they are below forty!

Anyhow, here is the story! An elderly widow and a widower had been dating for five years. He finally asked her to marry him, and she immediately said yes, but the next morning, he could not remember what her answer had been! In desperation, he decided to call her. He said, ‘This is really embarrassing, but when I asked you to marry me yesterday – well, this morning, I just could not remember what your answer was.’ She suddenly said, ‘Oh, I am so glad you called! I remembered saying yes to someone, but I could not remember who it was!’

I think that would have been the ultimate marriage! Different levels of absent-mindedness!

When you are absentminded internally, you are caught in addiction. I don’t mean only the addiction to alcohol or drugs or smoking. Any action performed repeatedly without awareness is an addiction, even if it is not a visibly dangerous addiction. For example, you can see in your whole life, you walk in the same way inside your house! You sit on the same sofa every day. When you come downstairs, you come in the same way. Sometimes, maybe for six months, you don’t even use many parts of your house! If you try to live for a few days with awareness, you will notice this.

The spiritual term aparigraha means, living with minimum things. Whatever you have not used for the last six months, donating it to some charity; giving it away – this is aparigraha.

In that case, you will have to give many parts of your house! It means, absent-mindedness about your surroundings.

Forget about parts of your house, you may even need to give away parts of your body..! No, really! Most of the time, you don’t feel that you are alive inside your complete body. It is all just lying there because you cannot disconnect it! Because it is already connected, it is coming with you wherever you go! Otherwise you yourself are not aware. Many times, you are not aware of your hands. You are not aware of your legs. It is there because it is there, that’s all.

Your breathing – you are not aware! Your digestion – you are not aware. Many times, people come and ask me to give them suggestions for their diet. I tell them, ‘YOU are eating, YOU are digesting; you are asking about ME about your diet? What is going on?!’ I can’t understand the concept of asking somebody else about YOUR diet. It means that you are not even aware of your digestion!

Be aware! For the next ten days, whenever you eat, be aware of how you feel in the stomach, how you feel with the whole process of digestion and cleaning. Just be aware of your whole digestion system. You can very clearly understand what makes you feel uncomfortable and what makes you feel relaxed. Suddenly your body will tell you the right quantity, right quality, everything. Just create your diet based on that. That’s all!

That is why Patanjali never speaks about a particular diet. He only gives you simple suggestions to bring more awareness to what is happening inside you. Unfortunately, now, the moment you are done with your meal, you are disconnected. You forget all about what is happening inside your stomach till the next meal. You are completely unaware of what is happening inside you. Yoga is nothing but the process of bringing your awareness to You.

Of course, sometimes people cannot even practice yoga because they are too unaware! A person once came and told me, 'Swamiji, I can't practice yoga. Can you suggest something else?' I said, 'Why?' He said, 'They say, to practice yoga, there should be a gap of three hours after the last meal!' We have become so insensitive, so disconnected!

I want you to remember this - 'nidra' means 'disconnect'. There are so many definitions of nidra. Today, carry this one definition with you. Just internalize this one idea, let this one idea ring inside you. Internalize, internalize, internalize, till you come back tomorrow.

For the next ten days, whenever you eat, be aware of how you feel in the stomach, how you feel with the whole process of digestion and cleaning. Just be aware of your whole digestion system.