First thing: a question starting with 'why' can never be answered. See, 'why' is of the mind and 'how' is of the being. In the Shiva Sutras – techniques given by Lord Shiva to his consort Devi, Devi asks a series of questions for which Shiva replies in the form of 112 meditation techniques.

Devi never asks 'why'. She only asks 'how'. With a devotional mind, with a devotional heart, 'why' can never be asked. And no 'why' has ever been answered and can never be answered. This is because 'why' is from the mind and the moment you feed the mind some answer, it will just find one more 'why'. The same way how the leaves grow out of trees, 'whys' grow out of the mind. When you cut the tree's leaves, many more leaves will grow. And unless the mind is answered completely, it will restlessly go on. But the mind cannot be answered. It can only be dissolved. The mind is never meant to be answered, it is only meant to be dissolved!

Understand: Existence simply is. There can be no 'why' asked about it. Can you ask a question about the trees or the sky or anything of nature? No! You simply cannot! Rivers will flow, clouds will float, that's all! Nothing can be asked about it.

You see: with anything alive, your mind feels uneasy. With anything which is not known, your mind becomes restless. It wants to be the knower of everything. Your mind cannot bear to be with anything alive. But with the dull and the dead, the mind will be at ease because with what is dull and dead, everything is certain; there is no mystery at all. But life is very much the opposite! It is so unpredictable. It can never be known. The future can never be fixed. It is completely unknown. But with a dead thing, everything is certain, everything is fixed, there is nothing to worry about and the mind is at ease.

The deep urge of the mind, the struggle of the mind is to make everything certain because the mind is afraid of life. The mind is in continuous search of explanations because once an explanation is acquired, you feel you have solved the mystery.

See, mystery makes the mind vulnerable only because when it is unknown, it cannot be overpowered. It is something which you cannot manipulate. And something which you cannot manipulate overwhelms you. It is something before which you simply dissolve. Mystery gives you the feeling of death. It is the death of the mind. This is why the resistance. And you resist by going on asking why.

Now, don't think that I am avoiding you question. No! I am telling you about the mind. And if you can retain the feeling of mystery, I will answer. If this mystery is retained, then there is no problem. It is only when the mystery is lost that there is something seriously wrong.

So if the mystery is retained, then answering becomes useful. If it is retained, then the very mystery will lead you into a deeper mystery. If this is the case, you will not be asking questions to get an explanation; you will be asking only to get deeper into the mystery. The very quality of the doubt will be different. The curiosity will not be of the mind but that of the being.

When I am talking to all of you, remember one thing: I am not speaking to silence your inquiry. I am not speaking to give you any explanation either. I am speaking only to deepen the inquiries within you; enough to simply put you into the mystery. My answers will create more questions and a time will come when the questions will drop. And when this happens you will be in the mystery. Mystery will be all around you - both within and without. Then you have become part of the mystery; the mystery has become a part of you.

With this understanding, I can answer your question.

Never think that you are only with me now. Life is like a river - like a flow. Everything is interrelated. Actually, for utility purposes, we have created the past, present and future. But in actuality, there are no divisions. Life is like a continuous river. A river will continue to flow; it will continue regardless of time. A river knows neither past nor future. It is eternally present, that's all.

In the same way, you have been with me and you are with me. I am not bringing the past at all. Just like a river that had always been and will always be, you will always be. You are with me and you will continue to be with me. This being has nothing to do with time.

Life is eternally present. We have always been here - in different forms, different situations, that's all. The very concept of individuality is fiction. Life is not divided and it can never be divided. We are not islands. We are one ocean. Individuality itself is a myth. It is like a small wave trying to become an entity separate from the ocean. Can a wave ever become a separate entity? No! The wave is part of the ocean. Whether the wave believes it or not, accepts it or not, it is part of the ocean.

So this oneness should be felt. Once it is felt, the concept of time automatically drops. Space and time become meaningless. And when time is dropped, you simply are!

You are here because you are. I am here because I am. It is simply the way life has happened. When I tell you this, it will be difficult to accept. But if I were to tell you that you are a great seeker of the truth and you are very fortunate to be here…if I were to tell you all these big words, your ego will be relaxed, your ego will be satisfied. Be very clear: I am not here to satisfy your ego. I am here to tell you what is.

I tell you: life has chosen to happen this way. Life has chosen for you to be here. It is simply how life has happened to you. It has happened before and it will go on happening in the same way. The moment you can understand this, the very fear of life will drop. You will be able to allow what has to happen to happen. You will allow life to flow through you. Life becomes like a breeze, and you an open window. Life will come and go and again come; you will allow it.

Let you understand: you are not here because of any choice on your part and I am not here because of any choice of mine. You simply are and I simply am. There can never be any choice in life. Life flows with whatever Existence wills. However, as of now you are under the illusion that you are making choices. The ego creates this within you. The ego makes you believe that you are making choices. But in reality, choices can never be made because in reality, you are not. If you are not, then who is there to make choices? Once you have dropped what you think to be yourself, the illusion of choice drops with it.

To tell you honestly: we have never met. As long as the 'i' is there, there is no meeting possible. Only when you are empty will we meet. Only two emptinesses can meet; there is no other meeting possible.

There is a Zen story…

A student asked a Zen Master, 'What is Zen?'

'It is right before your eyes,' the Master replied.

'Then why can I not see it?' the student asked.

'Because of your 'I'.

'If I don't have this idea of 'I', will I realize Zen?' asked the student.

'If there is no 'I' who wants to realize Zen?' the Master asked.

So the moment you become empty, the moment that you are not, merging will be possible. And this is the way to become one with Existence. When the 'i' is dropped, then the boundaries are also lost. And when the boundaries are lost, everything that was, everything that is, becomes you. You become the whole of Existence.

In the same way: you will only meet me once you have dropped your self. Now you are near me but you have never met me. And this possibility of being near me should be used, it should be utilized. It must not be missed.

It is as easy to miss a Master as it is to be attracted to him. And this attraction is so deep, it is so total. It is not like any other attraction which you have felt before. This is because the Master is empty. And emptiness serves as a magnet. It attracts all those who are full.

It is as if you have put a glass out under the rain. Only a few raindrops will fall into the glass. In the same way, this space that we are in is like a glass. Those few, who by chance fall inside, are blessed.

Do not miss. Your being here is a rare happening for many reasons. Your mind is afraid of death. Even in times of misery, the mind will cling to life. A lust for life is always there along with the fear of death. And when you come to me, you are coming to dissolve; you are coming for the death of the 'i'.

It is like an abyss. You will fall and continue to fall without a bottom. It is as if a leaf is falling into an abyss - into the infinite. It goes on falling - falling and falling until it disappears. And this is what is happening right now. You are continuously falling. And you will go on falling until you realize that no one has ever been falling. It is at this moment that you disappear.

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Just as clouds are continuously being directed by wind, could You tell us about what or who is continuously directing us?

First thing: clouds are not directed by anything. Let you be clear: the very idea of direction only exists when there is resistance. If the cloud wishes to move north and the wind is moving it south, there is resistance, so we can say that direction is there. But if the cloud does not wish to go anywhere, then north and south, east and west, they mean nothing! Then there is no resistance, direction also disappears.

Direction is only possible when there is resistance. You can only direct a person if he is not ready to relax and let go. The beauty of a cloud is that it will not resist. Resistance is not its nature. If the wind blows west, it will move along with it. If the cloud was moving west and the wind begins to blow east, the cloud will move to the east. This is the beauty. The wind is not directing, the wind is simply blowing and the cloud is simply moving along with it.

When people come to me and ask for guidance, when they ask me for direction, I simply keep quiet! You see: the very question of asking me for direction shows that they are not ready - otherwise, what is the need to ask? Simply being here, simply being here in this space is more than enough; things will start happening. It is just like a cloud. If the wind blows south, you will also move south; there is no direction at all. But when you ask for guidance, it shows that you are resisting. See, with a cloud, there is no distinction about which the wind is and which the cloud is. Because if the wind simply blows and the cloud simply moves, where is the question of boundaries? They simply are - that's all! Boundaries exist only with will.

So the boundary between you and me only exists because of your will. You are surrounded by will. A cloud has no will and because of this there is no boundary. There is no beginning of the cloud nor ending of the wind. They are one. The cloud is a part of the wind and vice versa. There is no division, only unity.

The wind will go on blowing. It will move in all directions. It will go on changing. There is no direction. There is no north nor south, nor east nor west. It will simply blow completely uncharted and completely unpredictable. Whatever the wind may do, wherever it may go, the cloud will come along as one entity.

We are continuously avoiding. We are avoiding the opportunity to raise our consciousness. We start thinking about others, but we avoid thinking about ourselves. We will think about space, planets, age and time. We will think about what is going to happen to human consciousness. But we avoid the fundamental question: what will happen to my consciousness?

It is your consciousness which should become your focus.

The time has come. The time is now.

Is our unhappiness based upon our own choice? Do we choose it? And if we do, how is it that we are not aware of such a choice?

You must understand this clearly. Human beings are always choosing unhappiness. This is to do with the way we have been brought up. If you are unhappy there is always some materialistic gain. And this starts from the very beginning. A child begins to notice, he begins to see that when unhappy, he receives sympathy. People become loving towards him. He gains attention.

Attention is what the ego lives on. When attention is given, you feel as if you are somebody. You begin to feel more important. Whereas, if no one pays you any attention, if they remain indifferent to you, you feel like a nobody. We fight through our whole lives working for attention, continuously feeding the ego.

Ego is present through our whole lives in every situation. However, the ego is most prominent in our relationships. The more attention you receive from others, the more satisfied the ego becomes. The more people praise you, the larger you feel. But if people were to completely forget you, your ego feels insecure. The ego's very survival comes under threat.

A child learns politics from the very beginning. He learns to look ill, to be unhappy because these things will gain attention; they will gain sympathy. When a child is happy, everyone is as they are; there will be no special attention. So from the very beginning, we choose to be miserable and seek attention. This is one thing.

Second thing: whenever you are happy, whenever you are blissful, the people around you become jealous. This same attitude you carry towards children also. When you see children being joyful and noisy all the time, you become jealous of them. This is the truth. But you ask them to keep quiet in the name of disciplining them.

When you see small chldren whirling so joyfully and totally, they do it blissfully; that is the beautiful thing. But you people, what do you do when you see them whirl? You get uncomfortable and shout to them to keep quiet and sit. Actually, you are simply jealous. You have become so suppressed that you feel uncomfortable when someone else is expressing themselves.

And the same thing happens in our lives. When you are laughing, when you are expressing your own bliss while everyone around you is dull, they become jealous of you. So you have learnt not to show your bliss. You have learnt not to show your laughter.

Just observe yourself when you laugh. You will first look at everyone around you. Then you will calculate how much laughter to show. I have seen people. When I am telling some joke, they will not simply let go and laugh. They will first look at the others. They will first look at everyone to see if they are laughing along with them. And only if someone is there to give them company they will laugh. But by the time they do all of this, by the time they find some companion to laugh with, the moment would have had passed and they would have missed the juice of the joke.

Even our laughter has become a social matter. Bliss has become completely unknown. Just see the way life has become. If you are ecstatic, if you are dancing in the streets out of an expression of your inner bliss, people will think that you are mad. But if you are dull and dead people will think that you are perfectly alright.

You see: if people become blissful, the whole society will have to change because society is currently based on suffering. If people are blissful, you cannot make them chase money. You cannot lead them into wars. A person who is blissful will simply laugh at all of this and think it is complete nonsense!

So if people become blissful, society will have to change. And society has invested so much on misery. This is the reason why we bring up children to lean towards misery.

Understand; you have a choice. Every moment of your life, you have a choice whether you would like to be blissful or miserable. You have been choosing to be miserable. It has become a habit for you. Not only a habit, it has become an unconscious choice in you.

It seems easy for you to move towards misery. Ecstasy appears to be uphill and misery appears to be downhill. Ecstasy appears to be very difficult to reach. Misery seems to be the most natural way to be. But in reality, it is completely the opposite. Ecstasy is downhill and misery is uphill.

Ramana Maharishi, an enlightened Master from South Bharat has once said, 'Enlightenment is easier than peeling a potato.'

Bliss is easiest thing possible. It is your inherent nature. On the contrary, misery is the most difficult thing to achieve; it goes against your nature. No one wants to be miserable, yet everyone is miserable.

Every child is born a God and the same child dies a madman. Just see what is happening! Children are close to God. I am not saying that children neve rbecome unhappy. But when a child is unhappy, there is a certain beauty to it. Children are total in whatever they do. When a child is unhappy, he simply becomes the unhappiness. This is why he still appears to be beautiful.

One more thing: when you do something totally, the emotion underlying it will simply pass. This is why if you see when a child becomes angry and when he indulges in his anger totally, once the anger has passed, the child becomes so relaxed. After this anger, the child will be relaxed. There will be no trace of his anger left. But this is not the case with us. When we become angry, we suppress our anger because it is not proper to show that we are angry. The suppressed anger will settle down in us like a residue.

So the moment you separate yourself as one ego, misery is sure to follow. But if you are open, if you simply flow with whatever life may bring, intensely, so totally that you simply disappear, everything will become blissful for you. And the choice is there, it is very much present. But you have become unaware of it. To choose unhappiness has become a habit within you. You are just choosing it automatically. Hence there seems like there is no choice left.

Now I tell you: become aware. Become aware of this choice. When you feel yourself sinking into depression or unhappiness, simply decide to switch. And if you can find the right time, the right moment to turn within; when you are at the border of happiness and unhappiness, you will clearly feel the choice. Once you have become aware of this choice, the whole thing would have become clear to you. Then if you would like to be miserable, the choice is yours. No one else is responsible for your misery. You create your own drama. And in the same way, happiness can be chosen. When you feel unhappiness coming onto you, simply tell yourself, 'No! This is not how I am going to live. I am going to be happy.' And you will see; happiness is bound to come; it is bound to happen.

So from this moment, make it a decision, make it a choice within you. From moment to moment, tell yourself that you are going to be blissful.

One more thing: life depends on cause and effect. Cause and effect is the very base of what your life is to be. You create the cause and the effect follows. Whatever you do, the effect will always follow. Cause and effect is the innermost link of all processes of life.

For example: you see someone that you have not seen for a long time. You then become happy. So this person is the cause and happiness is the effect. In our ordinary lives, the effect follows the cause. Your emotions are based upon the causes.

Now, if you can simply create your emotions without there being a cause, then you are living without the walls of the mind. If you can simply be happy and blissful without there being any cause, then you are living outside of your mind. This is the ideal way of living. This is what I am trying to give you all. If you can be blissful without a cause, then the mind is no longer deciding your emotions. You will become the creator of your own emotions. Just imagine the freedom with which you will be living! You will be able to simply tell your body what you would like to feel. If you have the ability to decide your emotions, you will naturally choose bliss.

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I hear what You are saying, I understand what You are saying. But the problem is, with the Western mind, I only understand through my intellect. How may I get out of this, how can I get out of my head? And is it something to do with willpower?

Willpower will not help you. Willpower can never help you because it is dependant on the ego. See, willpower is only used as a means to hide our weakness. We always create the opposite to deceive others as well as ourselves. People who are foolish will try to appear wise. People who are ugly will try to appear beautiful. People who are unhappy will try to appear happy. So the opposite is created to hide what really is. We create a mask to hide what we really are. On the contrary, those who are beautiful will be unaware of their beauty. Those who are strong will be unaware of their strength.

Willpower is not power; it is weakness. A person who is powerful will have no will of his own. His will is that of the whole. As long as you have your own will, there will always be conflict. It will be like an island on the vast ocean.

And one more thing: you can never get out of the head. Trying to get out of the head will only create a fight within you. This trying to get out is the fight. So what can be done? You should not try to get out of the mind, rather you should overcome it. Simply watch. Simply be inside and watch.

Understand: if you can simply watch, then the head is not used at all. You have not dropped the mind; the mind would have dropped you. Hence you have overcome the mind.

I am reminded of a small story:

A young girl became pregnant. Her parents were extremely upset with her. They went on pestering her in hopes of finding out who the child's father was.

After a lot of questions and a lot of scolding, the girl named a Zen Master who lived close by. The parents went to the Master, yelled and literally abused him for his criminal act.

"Is that so?" the Master said.

After this incident, everybody started speaking ill of the Master. He became a man whose name when merely mentioned, would make everyone uncomfortable.

When the baby was born, the girl's parents took it to the Master and asked him to bring up the child by himself.

The Master took the baby without a word. He took good care of the baby, getting it milk and clothes from his neighbors. He did whatever was necessary to bring up the child.

About a year later, the girl confessed that she had lied to the parents. The actual father of the baby was a young man. The girl's parents immediately went to the Master. They apologized endlessly for their behavior, and requested him to return the baby. They told him that the actual father of the baby was another man.

The Master said, "Is that so?" and returned the baby.

So understand: when a person can become the witness of all that happens, the mind not only drops him, but he becomes untouched by whatever may happen. And this is the case not only with incidents that may happen outside you, but also with all that happens within you. For example: your thoughts. Just close your eyes and watch your thoughts. Watch every though that comes as if you are watching a film before you. Just watch all that may come and remain completely detached. What has happened in you? Thoughts are there, but you are not involved. After some time, you will see these thoughts gradually reducing. They are bound to reduce because how long can the mind continue its battle of intrusion? It is bound to give up you see!

The best way to overcome the mind is by simply watching it. If you can just understand this one thing, if you can simply catch the thread, thoughts will drop you. You will automatically slip into the witnessing. All that is needed is the simple understanding. If you can witness your thoughts and feel your thoughts gradually decrease, witnessing is bound to happen to you automatically. All that is needed is the simple taste.

See, I am not saying to run from the thoughts; I am not saying to suppress them, no! I am telling you to become aware of them. And there is nothing wrong with thoughts. What is wrong is your unawareness which comes with your thoughts. You become entwined in them. You forget to act without them

For example: you will be sitting in the office and working. After sometime, you will look at your wrist watch and see the time. 1'o clock you will think and then suddenly your stomach will feel empty. It is not that your stomach is empty, but it is the mind which projects itself onto the body. And in the same way, the stomach may have been feeling hungry for a long time, but your unawareness fails to recognize it until the mind interferes.

Really, you are not living. You are not living life. Your mind is coming inside. The mind is not allowing the body to act through its own instinct. This is the basic problem.

Now I tell you: watch the mind, witness the mind. You will see yourself beginning to transcend it, to overcome it. And when this happens, you will be living.

So, we will see in the next session.

I have heard You mentioning to us about how easy it is to drop the mind and our egos. Yet I am not able to do so. I have not been able to drop the mind. So by telling us that it is easy to drop, are You installing some sort of hope within us so that it may happen to us?

First thing: understand that this very question has come from the root of your ego. The ego is fed with logic, with reason and questions. And you have thought, you have thought quite a bit over this question na?! As long as you continue to remain host to such questions, not only remain host, but going on reasoning over such questions, be very clear: you are very much in the mind.

Second thing: when I tell you about the easiness of dropping the mind I am telling you based on whatever has happened within me. It may appear like a very big thing now, but once you have overcome the mind, you will simply not be able to understand how you were clinging to it for so long.

And one more thing: this feeling like you are not able to overcome the mind is also being felt from the mind only. Just see the conspiracy with which you are living! The mind is only telling you that it will be difficult to drop and you are getting confused! The mind wants to cling to you, it wants to confuse you and you are falling as bate to it. So do not make this mistake!

When you are thinking that you are not able to drop the mind and all these things, simply turn within your self and see from where this doubt is coming. You will see it coming from the mind only. It is one of the ego's efforts to cling to you. So simply say to your mind, 'Keep Quiet!' And you will see the mind silencing itself. It all depends on the intensity with which you try to silence such doubts. If you put forth your whole inner strength, the mind itself will be shaken!

So I am not trying to install any such hope within you. You see: the very concept of hope is also from the ego. Hope is the derivation of a very beautiful thing- faith. Faith is beautiful. It is a branch of bhakti, devotion. And bhakti can only be achieved when the mind is no more.

Hope has been created by our egos. It has been created as a means to pacify our fate. It serves as a shield for the ego to face what may come. And I am not trying to shield you of what is. My purpose is to throw you into reality by the dropping of your ego. It would be completely contradictory to give you hope. If I were to give you hope it would serve as a cushion to make your ego feel comfortable with whatever may come. And by making the ego comfortable, it will tighten its grip on you.

This is more than enough.

The rest will be taken care.

Energy is the greatest phenomenon. The first thing that you must understand about all energies is that in order for there to be a certain energy, the opposite pole should also be there. See, happiness cannot exist without depression. If there were no depression, happiness would simply be the way of life, there would be no word for it.

Energy moves in a polarity. For any energy to become alive, the opposite pole is needed. It is just like electricity. If there is only negative polarity, electricity will not happen. And in the same way, if there is only positive polarity, electricity will not be possible. So both polarities are needed to make electricity a reality. So the same holds true for energy. And not only for energy, but it holds true for Existence itself.

If there were only man, life would not be possible. And if there were only women, there would be no life; both are needed. Between man and woman, there exists a balance. So between man and woman- between these two poles flows the river of life. Just look around you and see, without two opposite poles of something, nothing can be possible.

I have explained this concept to you because polarity is a very prominent factor in meditation. You see: the mind operates through logic whereas life is completely dialectical. When I say that the mind is logical, it means that the mind moves in a line. And when I say that life is dialectical I mean that it moves in the completely opposite manner. It continuously moves between the negative and positive poles. It uses the opposites.

See: the mind simply moves in a straight line. It never moves to the opposites; it denies the opposites. The mind feels comfortable with staying in the same dull, straight line. It feels uneasy towards change. So the mind believes in one and life believes in two.

There comes a time when you become aware of the noise which the mind creates. It is at this time that your mind becomes silent. And if the mind chooses to be silent, just imagine the way in which life will become. Now instead of completely going with the noise, the mind will completely move towards silence. But still there will be no polarity.

According to me, whether the mind chooses noise or silence, it is one and the same. It is contradictory for the mind to choose silence because the mind itself is noise. So even if the mind tries to be silent, it is something like one thread of the same cloth.

When the mind tries to be silent, it will still be like a straight line. However when there are polarities, the very quality will be different. Understand the difference. The silence of the first is a dead silence. Concentration may be there, but if it is dead silence it is meaningless.

Silence must happen when you are totally alive. When you are silent, you should radiate vitality. When a person is truly silent, I say the quality will be different because it is an explosion of life. When this happens, your silence will be meaningful. So this silence will not be dull, it will be alive. You will be able to see very clearly a subtle balance between the two polarities.

Such a person will be able to remain silent in the markets and noisy in the mountains. They will be able to remain balanced with the polarities.

One more thing that you all should understand: the opposite energy should never be denied or rejected. It should be used. The only way to create this balance is through accepting both energies. When you would like to be happy, the depression must first be accepted. Do not reject the depression; do not deny it. If you can accept it, happiness is bound to follow. And once this happiness comes, a balance must be created between the two polarities.

It is as if there are two banks to one river. You are the river who will use both banks; both poles unconditionally. You will remain balanced between the two. So move in life as freely as possible with all the banks. Keep all the banks with you and create a balance for which you can remain blissfully silent within your self.

Mmm…

I have heard You say that the ego can be dropped 'this very minute'. Can the ego also be dropped gradually, bit by bit?

The dropping of your ego always happens in this moment. It will always happen in this moment. There can be no gradual dropping of it. It is an instantaneous happening. It is not something for which you can get ready. There is no way to get ready to drop the ego. Be very clear: whatsoever your efforts may be to drop the ego will only strengthen it. Any gradual process will strengthen the ego because it is done by the ego. In the same way: whatever happens instantaneously would have been done by you, not the ego.

For example: you may be walking through a grassy path when you come across a snake. You suddenly jump to the side. It is not a gradual process for which you can get ready for. It simply happens automatically. It is not connected to the past, nor is it connected to the future. It is part of the now. If you can continuously be in the spontaneity of now, the ego will drop.

The problem is that you are not able to understand about the ego. The ego is your conditionings, your mental setup, all that you have accumulated from society. The ego exists in the past and future. And then you are bothering about gradually dropping the ego- you again bring the past and future. The dropping of the ego is a sudden affair. It happens just this moment. But the moment you bring in the past and the future, you have missed.

The ego exists through memory: who you are, your race, gender, from where you come from, your religion, tradition- all of that has happened in the past. All of this has happened to the ego. And you are the person to which all of this has happened. So understand: the ego is that which is around you. It consists of all that you conceive yourself to be. However, you are in the center; completely untouched; egoless.

A child is born absolutely fresh. That is why they are so beautiful. There is no past, no ego at all. They cannot say 'I' because no 'I' exists. Their I has to develop gradually. They will have to be educated; society must first tell them what is right and what is wrong. They will have to be both appreciated as well as condemned. And then, only then will the I slowly begin to form.

Children are beautiful for the one reason that they are fresh with no past. Have you seen even a single child who is ugly? But have you seen even a single grown man who is beautiful?!

Understand: an old man is not ugly because of his age. He is ugly because of there being too much past- too much of ego. And this same old man can become beautiful once again; even more beautiful than he was as a child. I am not talking about physical beauty. I am talking about an inner beauty, an inner grace that is radiated from within. And this is only possible when the ego is dropped. When the ego is dropped, it is like a new childhood- he is reborn again. It is this childhood that is eternal. It lasts an eternity because the quality of this rebirth is of a totally new accord. It is not of the body- it is of spirit.

So if the ego can be dropped, you will remain forever fresh; forever innocent. This is because now you are not bothered about the past, nor are you bothered about the future. Now you are totally in the present.

See: the ego functions in time. The more time conscious you become, the stronger the ego becomes. According to me, the concept of time exists only because of the ego. The ego needs time to exist. The ego needs space to grow. Time serves as this space.

Take this as an example: if I were to tell you that you are going to die; if I tell you that you will die the next moment, time will suddenly disappear. You become uneasy and you will not be able to do anything without difficulty. Even thinking becomes difficult. So even for thinking, time is needed. If there is no future for you, thinking becomes difficult. If there is no tomorrow, then what is there to think? There is nothing to worry about, there is nothing to desire. If there is no time, the mind automatically drops. Understand?

The ego, the mind cannot exist without time. Time serves as the breath for the ego. If tomorrow exists, the ego will exist. If there is no tomorrow, there will be no ego. It is like a river and a boat. Only if the river is there, the boat can function. Without the river's water, the boat becomes useless.

Because time is needed for the ego to function, the mind will only think in terms of time. No matter what is put forth, the first thought to enter is that of time. What time to go to wake up in the morning to what time to go to the office to what time to go to bed at nighteverything revolves around one single thing- time. And even when meditation is put forth, the first though is, 'there is no time.' What nonsense!

During any meditation program, there will always be someone who will say, 'Swamiji, I enjoy these meditations, but it seems as if there is just no time in my daily routine to practice these things.'

I am just not able to understand these things. I always tell people: God has given you twenty four hours in a day and you cannot even spare Him twenty minutes!

So now, when I talk of enlightenment and all, the first thing that comes into your head will be, 'Yes, enlightenment is possible, I know. I understand it, but time is needed. Maybe I can work up to it gradually.' But such a thing cannot be reached gradually, you see! As I said before, it will simply happen!

The mind would like to take everything in steps. To do something suddenly, to do something spontaneously and in the moment is against the nature of the mind. This is why the mind will come up with excuses for meditation. Be very clear: saying that there is no time and all of these things is simply cunning. Preparing for something, gradually moving up to something is a very logical thing.

So if you can understand that the ego can be dropped this very moment, the question is bound to arise: If there is no gradual growth and the ego can be dropped this moment, then why is it not dropping?

You do not want to drop the ego; this is the reason why it is not dropping. This will be a little difficult to understand- you do not want to drop the ego. Contemplate upon this. You do not want to drop it, this is why it continues. If you sincerely wanted to drop it, you could simply shake out of it.

The mind is a mystery. You think that you want to drop it, and deep within you, if you see, you are only the hindrance for this dropping; you are only clinging to it. If you want to drop it, there is nothing stopping you. There is no barrier. In fact, if you wanted to drop the ego, the ego will by itself drop. If you stop clinging, the ego will loosen its grip on you. But if you continue to cling, nothing can be done.

Have you ever though about it? You wonder about why the ego is not dropping, but have you ever meditated upon this doubt? Look within yourself and you will see, there will be some attachment to the ego, to the mind. We always want to be someone. We want recognition. And this recognition is of the mind; it is of the ego. Once you drop the ego, you will disappear; there will be no one to recognize. This is one of the main reasons why there is so much of resistance when it comes to the dropping of the ego.

In whatever you do, the ego is present. Even in your so- called humbleness is simply a hiding place for the ego. I have seen many so- called humble people. Those fellows will try to prove that they are very humble. This very trying to prove attitude is directly from the ego. And if they see any other person who is more humble than themselves, they will feel hurt. If this is the case, there is no humbleness.

Actually, any emotion cannot be said as ego- less. This is because these emotions have been labeled by the ego only. So to be ego- less cannot fit under a particular emotion at all. In fact, I cannot even say that to be ego- less is blissful. This is because the bliss which I know is completely different from the bliss which you know. However, I label it as bliss because it is the closest thing. To be ego- less is bliss, and something more. It is this 'something more' which has to be revealed to you.

To drop the ego, this clinging nature must first be dropped. The moment that you can understand that you are clinging, it will happen. There is something lurking in you, some factor for which you are still clinging to the ego.

You somehow feel that without you the world may not go on. This is the case with everyone. This is the lurking factor. If the ego disappears, you will disappear along with it. We always feel that without us, the world will simply fall apart. Understand; the world will go on in spite of you.

And this is the reason why the mind is in continuous search for some occupation. It would much rather be busy thinking or doing something than to be unoccupied. When you are unoccupied, you become vulnerable. You start to feel as if you are dissolving. When you are occupied you feel as if the world cannot go on without you.

But then if you are suddenly unoccupied, you receive a sudden blow. You see that without you, the world is still functioning. Nothing is changing. And then you start feeling as if you are not needed. The moment you start feeling that you are not needed, the ego becomes uneasy. The ego exists only when you are needed. The moment you are not needed, the ego loosens its grip on you.

When you are unoccupied, you see that the rat race continues. No body will be bothered about you. They may even feel relieved! This is what shatters the ego. So, for the ego to exist, it must have something to keep busy. It must maintain its illusion upon itself that it is needed.

Meditation is the ultimate unoccupied state of mind. I am not telling you to physically remain unoccupied; no! Whatever you may be doing, your mind should remain unoccupied. So, meditation is the ultimate retirement. And it is not just a superficial retirement that one takes up during their old age. It is a retirement of the mind. It is when the ego is put to rest.

See, in old age retirement, you will go on thinking something. Reading the newspaper some ten times a day, one can create the fantasy that they are still running with the world.

I have seen these old men reading the newspaper. And the fellow will be reading the matrimony column! What will he do by reading the matrimony column? I am simply shocked by seeing these guys! And somehow, by reading these types of things, the illusion that the world is still running because of them still exists.

Meditation is not a superficial retirement. It is a very deep, transcendental retirement. It is a withdrawal; a withdrawal from the mind. It is not that you will be physically unoccupied. You can by all means continue what you are doing. If you can withdraw your investment in this occupation, there will be a different quality of the work all together. You will begin to realize the foolishness of running behind this idea of wanting to be felt as needed. Now you will understand that the world can run without you, but now, there will be no depression when such an understanding comes. And there is such freedom, such lightness if you can understand this. Before, if such an understanding began to arise, you would feel as if you were being shattered.

Unless you are ready to be empty, unless you are ready to be unoccupied, unless you are ready to drop what you feel to be yourself, unless you are ready to enjoy and celebrate even if you are not needed, the ego will remain.

The main problem is that the ego has a need to be needed! If someone needs you, if someone has an urgent need to talk to you, the ego feels very good, very important. The more people need you, the more your ego feels satisfied. This is why there is such a craving for power, for leadership. If you are a leader, people will come to you, there is a need for you. Your ego becomes much fulfilled.

If you can remain unoccupied, if you can remain happy without being needed, the ego can drop this very minute. The ego can be dropped just now. It is just like water being heated. It will go on getting hotter and hotter and at a particular degree, it begins to evaporate. Evaporation happens in a single moment. It is not a gradual affair; it is a sudden happening. Suddenly the water disappears into vapor. Evaporation happens suddenly. It is the heating which takes time.

The dropping of the ego happens in the same way. Understanding takes time; it is like the heating of water. The dropping of the ego is like evaporation; it happens suddenly. For now, do not try to drop the ego. Doing this will only put you into a deeper confusion. Try to deepen your understanding. Do not try to try to turn water into vapor. Heat it first. The final stage will happen by itself. It has to happen.

So bring all of your energy into understanding the phenomenon which is your self; your true self; your being. Try to understand what is happening to you. Understand from where your emotions come. Try to understand the roots from where everything enters into your mind. When you feel a sudden burst of anger, do not give into the anger. Turn your awareness inwards. See from exactly where everything is coming. You are bound to find the roots.

If you can find the roots to all that happens within you, then you will also have the ability to see what is of the ego and what is of reality. You see: if you can go to the roots of something particular that happens to you, two things may happen. One: you will realize the falsity of it and it will slowly begin to disappear. Or two: it will become more rooted in you.

With this understanding, many things will become clear to you. You will understand that if something reveals itself as false, then it was never there to begin with. It was simply a projection of the ego.

In the same way, if you become more rooted in something, it is of reality. As the falsity of the ego slowly begins to reveal itself to you through uncovered understandings, a new understanding will happen within you. It will be understood that the ego was also never there; it was only a projection of the falsity. Understand?

Could You please talk to us about the difference between suppressing and expressing our emotions through our mind?

You have two choices. You can either suppress your emotions, or you can transform them. Suppression and transformation exists as two aspects to the same thing. This thing is that man can change himself. And man is the only creation of Existence who has been given the choice to change himself.

Look at any other creature that exists. Birds exist, plants exist; there are so many animals that exist, but they cannot do anything about their existence. They are apart of one big whole, they do not have the ability to stand out of it. They exist as a whole. They cannot separate themselves.

This is not the case with man. He is totally different. He can do something about himself. He has the ability to observe himself as though he were a witness. He can watch his energies as though they were separate from him. He can either suppress his energies or he can transform them into something greater.

Suppressing a certain energy is to simply hide what is already there. By suppressing, you will not be allowing them to be expressed at their own lengths. Transforming a certain energy means to change it into a new dimension.

See, there are so many emotions which society does not accept. There are many emotions which make you feel embarrassed. And this embarrassment is not your embarrassment. It is the embarrassment which society has taught you to feel.

Suppression seems to be the easiest way to avoid the vulnerability of the ego. It exists as a protection, as a security measure. And what are you getting out of fighting with your emotions? By fighting, the emotion is not going to disappear. If anything, you will create the illusion that it has disappeared. And all of a sudden, the emotion will happen in full swing.

Now, when there is an emotion which proves disturbing to you, do not suppress. Simply become aware of it. Awareness is the key to any transformation. And if you can transform your energies, then no energy will act as a disturbance to you.

A small story:

Two monks were traveling along a road. It was raining heavily. The roads were filled with mud and large pools of water here and there. At a bend, they saw a beautiful girl in a silk dress standing helplessly on the road. She wanted to cross over to the other side of the road but could not because of the water. One of the monks lifted her in his arms and put her down on the other side.

The monks took shelter in a lodging temple that night. The second monk then said to the first, 'Monks are not allowed to go near woman, especially young and pretty woman. Why did you carry that girl like that?'

The first monk said, 'I left the girl there, why are you still carrying her?'

So understand: if you can become aware, no particular energy will disturb you. Unawareness leads to the carrying of emotions. If you can remain completely aware and at the same time remain a witness, after the incident has passed, it would have passed from your mind as well.

Start to witness all that you do throughout your day. Start with simple activities first. When you are eating, become aware. Feel every morsel which touches your lips; feel it moving down your throat. Enter into it completely. While walking, become aware. Feel every step. And I am not only saying to become aware of external things; you must also become aware of what is happening internally. Watch your thoughts; see the quality of your mind when awareness is added. The very quality will change. When awareness is there, thoughts cease. And if you can become aware of what is happening to you internally, witnessing happens automatically.

Now the next question that will come is, 'What is meant by witnessing?' Witnessing is watching all that is happening both within and without you. Not simply watching; it is watching as if you are watching from the outside. You should not feel as if anything is happening to you. Just as you would watch a movie, you should watch your life. It is all happening to someone else.

And the whole of life is just one big drama. This is the truth. We are all actors on a big stage. But over time, by continuously acting, we have forgotten that we are actors. We start thinking that the drama has become reality.

So by witnessing, one becomes aware of the drama again. Then nothing will disturb you. There will be no suppression, and at the same time, there will be no expression. Because the understanding will be there; you will understand that even if something is getting expressed, it is not getting expressed by you. This is because you are the witness, not the actor.

Just as the monk in the story accepts whatever is, you should accept and move on. Simply accept life as is and become aware of it.

A man who suppresses his desires will close his eyes when something disturbs him outside. And with these same closed eyes, what will happen? He will be doing all possible nonsense! Now, I am not saying that indulgence is correct, because as of now, society is such that if you go around indulging in everything, you will be looking a little funny!

So now, when something is the cause of disturbance in you, do not suppress, and do not indulge. Find a balance between the two. Become aware of what is happening in you. There is no need to close your eyes or turn your head to what is acting as a disturbance in you. Accept what you are seeing and what you are feeling. Acceptance and awareness, as I have said before, is the sure way to transformation.

I tell you now: become aware, accept, and you will see yourself moving beyond an emotion or energy which disturbs you.

We will meet in the next session.

Beloved Master,

Can You tell us something about relationships? How do the people who we are living with influence our lives?

A relationship is a very beautiful thing. And because it exists between two people, it is dependant on both. Together, both people can grow. Whenever you meet a new person for the first time, a new phenomenon comes into being which was not present before. And through this phenomenon, both people are changed.

Before the meeting, you are one thing, but after the relationship has happened, you are completely a new person. Just see in your lives: when a woman comes into contact with a lover, she comes out a completely new person. When a man becomes a father, there is a new light to him. When a child is born, there are two births; the mother is also reborn. The woman may have been there before, but now the mother is born.

A relationship is something which is created by you and at the same time, relationship creates you. When two people meet, it is like two worlds have met. Each person is a world unto himself. Each person is in their own world.

Initially, it is as if two peripheries have met. As the relationship enters a deeper level, then the centers start meeting. It is the meeting of these centers that we call love. When the peripheries meet, we can call it an acquaintance, but when centers meet, it is love.

It happens many times that we mistake acquaintance with love. Then one day, this love which we have felt has disappeared. If this happens, be clear that you have not entered love. Love is a very rare happening. In order to meet a person at his center, you would have to allow the person to reach your center. You will have to become vulnerable, completely open to the person. You will be completely exposed. All that you have hidden will be open. This is why there is fear; this is why love is so rare.

Through acquaintance, we think that we have loved. When you are with someone on the outside, on the periphery, you feel that you have met them. The periphery is like a fence around you, but it is not you. You are inside the fence, and a person can reach you only through love, through entering the fence. I have seen many husbands and wives who only know each other at these fences; they are only acquaintances. And by being acquaintances, you have never known the other.

There are two types of relationships: fear orientated and love oriented. Through this fear based relationship, you can never enter into love; you can never enter into a deep relationship. You will continuously remain afraid of the other coming to know you. There is a limit that the other is not permitted to cross. There is a wall for which when the other comes near, everything must stop.

However, a love oriented relationship is totally different. It is based on mystery. It is not bothered about the future or what may happen, or the consequence. It is a relationship where both completely enter into the moment and live in the now.

This is the relationship that I say is beautiful. Any other relationship on the periphery is dangerous. You simply become stuck with the other. You are not free to explore the depths of yourself. With love, there is no end to these depths; you go on moving deeper and deeper.

If you can be in the present moment, completely unbothered about anything, then only love is possible. Love is such an innocent emotion. It knows nothing but feeling. But these fellows who are stuck in an acquaintance relationships are simply intellectual fools; nothing more. A relationship with boundaries is a relationship straight out of the intellect.

Love is a rare flowering. I say it is rare because it can happen when there is no fear. When there is no fear, then there is nothing to hide, there are no boundaries. You reach the other's center and they reach yours. This is the beauty.

The moment fear enters a relationship, be very clear, it is not love. Then it is only an arrangement of two people who depend on each other, possess, dominate, manipulate, fight- but it is not love. Understand: I am saying it is an arrangement, not a meeting.

And what do you have to lose by letting your self be known by someone? Why is there fear? There is no harm in it. It is only one of the many misconceptions given to you by society. They tell you to hide; you must always fight and never trust anyone; everyone is against you. All of these things have been taught to you

First thing: no one is against you. Even if you are thinking that someone is against you, they too are not against you. Everyone is bothered about themselves. They are not concerned about you. This must first be understood. Then only is a relationship possible. There is nothing to be afraid about because no one is bothered!

So when the fear is dropped, two centers can meet. And when two centers meet a new thing is created- love. It is very much like water. When hydrogen and oxygen meet, water is created. But if you have only hydrogen or only oxygen, your thirst will not subside. Only when both meet, the thing will happen.

One more thing: when a person is in love, he becomes desire- less. He becomes content with whatsoever is around him. Desire arises out of discontentment. However, when there is love, when two centers have merged, then a new quality is born. With this, comes contentment; hence there are no desires.

Make love a happening. It should be directed towards no one or no thing. Love starts with someone and ends at your self. Do not allow it to be an occupation of the mind. Make it an inner search.

See, when you meet a person, you meet them at the periphery. By and by, as you move deeper into the relationship, the periphery of the person disappears, their form disappears. It is here that you move into the formlessness. And when you enter the formlessness of someone else, you are immediately thrown back to the formlessness or yourself. And if you go still deeper, then even this formless person begins to disappear. Now, a new door is opened. The formlessness of Existence is revealed to you. Through the other, the divine is found.

To move to the divine suddenly will be difficult. It is so vast, so expansive. We will not understand where to start. It is so beginning- less and so endless. We will not know how to move into it. Love is the door. The other is the door.

Do not make love a struggle, rather make it an invitation. If this can be done, suddenly, the other disappears and the divine is there.

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I hear Your words, and they are so beautiful. But I feel as if there is not only a communication happening through words, but something deeper. Can You talk to us about this silent communication that is happening?

See, this communication is always there. If you are listening to me, if you are really listening to me, then you will see, you are not only listening to the words. There is something more. Listening to me, the mind stops, the thinking is relaxed. When there are no thoughts, you become open. When you are not thinking, you become open. And then my work can start. Then, what has to happen will happen. So the words are used only as a device.

So actually, my message is not in the words, it is in the silence. But only when I am speaking, the mind becomes silent. If I am silent then the mind will start speaking. If you are silent just by yourself, then there is no need for me to speak. A time will come when you can simply sit next to me. There will be no need for me to speak because you will be silent. This is where the relationship between the two of us begins.

As of now, if I tell you to sit silently near me, will you be able to sit? You will go on talking, you will go on chattering. This will be the chattering from within you. In order to stop this inner chatter, I must talk. My talking will occupy the mind. My talking to you is just like a toy given to a child. The child will go on playing with it. He will become absorbed in it. He will lose himself in it. So take my words as toys. You become so absorbed in the words that you become silent.

Even if you have glimpses of the truth while hearing my words, it has not come from the words. It has come from your silence. If you have the trust that what I am saying is the truth, understand that this trust comes from the silence, not from the words. Whenever you are silent, truth can enter. When you are chattering and absorbing yourself in inner chatter, you miss the truth which is always there.

Whatever I may tell you to do; meditate, dance, whatever I may tell you to do has only one aim. This aim is to make you silent. Whenever you are silent, there is nothing to block the truth from entering. There are no words to block the truth.

The words give you an understanding. They give you inspiration to start your journey towards the truth. But words can never put you directly into the truth.

So allow yourself to get absorbed in the words. Allow yourself to enter the silence; the silence which is forever present.

Thank you.

I feel that by developing an attitude of endurance towards difficulties, I am being resigned to a lot of life. This resignation feeling, is acting as a weight which is pushing against my efforts to become more alive in my meditation. Does this mean that my ego is being suppressed? And in order to overcome it, must I find it again?

I can say that this is one of the greatest problems. Before you can lose the ego, you must attain it first. You must understand this: only a ripe fruit can fall from a tree to the ground. In the same way, an unripe ego cannot be dropped. So your efforts to drop the ego; this struggle which you are feeling is of no use.

The ego must reach its peak, it must become strong, only then can you dissolve it. A weak ego cannot be dissolved. And this becomes a problem.

We have continuously been taught, we have continuously heard to be against the ego. And because of this attitude, the ego never becomes strong. Now this is both a good thing, as well as a bad thing. The good thing is that a person with a smaller ego will be much more pleasant to talk with compared to a person with a larger one! The bad thing is that it will be harder to drop.

The ego like many other things will become its largest right before it disappears. It is just like a candle light. Right before the flame goes out; it flickers to its largest and then only goes out. The ego works in the same way. It must reach its heights before dissolving.

This is why, when you are here, you will experience many ups and downs in your emotions. And your emotions are controlled by the ego. So your ego is going through many fluctuations.

We have been taught to reject the ego. And instead of trying to overcome it, we start suppressing it. We try to hide it and through this, hypocrisy starts. You have the ego inside you and you try to hide it through showing yourself humble on the outside. Be very clear: this surface humbleness cannot deceive anyone. It will deceive only you, but no one else. This kind of a thing is nothing more than a self deception. This happens when you try to drop the unripe ego.

Now, this whole thing may appear very contradictory. You will be wondering why I am telling you to strengthen the ego. See, I am telling you to stop trying to drop the ego because as of now, it is an unripe ego. When the ego becomes ripe, it will drop you.

Life is full of contradictions. Here I am telling you to be egoists so that you can become egoless. I am not telling you to hide it because then it will become a hypocrisy. And there is no need to fight with the unripe ego. Let it ripen; bring it to its peak! When the ego is brought to its peak, only then you will understand the disturbance which it is creating.

When it is brought to its peak you will not need anyone one to tell you that it is a disturbance, you will come to understand yourself.

A small story:

A Master and his disciple were sitting together and talking. The Master pointed to a big stone and asked his disciple to tell him whether it was inside or outside of his mind. The disciple replied, 'Our Vedic teachings tell us that everything is a projection of the mind. So the stone must be inside my mind.'

The Master then remarked, 'Don't you get tired of carrying such a heavy weight?'

So in order to drop this weight, you must first make it heavy enough to drop. You must first realize the heaviness of it for yourself. And when you realize this weight, it will be difficult to carry on in the same way. You will simply have to drop it!

You become fed up with the ego, and when it reaches its peak, you suddenly begin to see the falsity of the whole thing. Everything you have been doing, the way in which you have been living will seem pseudo. You will see that you have never been at your center. You will see that you have never lived in reality.

Once a person can realize that he is not at his center, he will also realize that there is no center. The whole of Existence is the center. Existence exists as a totality. It exists as one big center.

Life is just like a dream. If a dream comes to its peak, you suddenly wake up. Whenever the dream reaches its climax, you are awakened. Right when you feel that the dream has become real, the so- called reality is broken. And it can never become real because it is a dream!

The ego is the greatest dream. Just as you are awakened in a dream when you have reached its peak, you will be awakened when you reach the peak of the ego.

You must understand one thing: as long as you think that you have dropped the ego, be very clear that it is still there. If the ego is no more, there is no you at all. So who is there to drop the ego? As long as the idea of you exists, understand that the ego is there.

When you think that you have dropped the ego, the ego is only playing a different game with you. Now it is playing a cunning game with you. Now it is creating the illusion that you have dropped it. Just see what is happening! The illusion is creating one more illusion!

If you are unconscious of the ego, it will manipulate you. If you can be conscious of it, it will be just a game. See, there is nothing wrong with the game. It is only when you forget that it is a game that it becomes a problem.

Become aware of the game. Become aware of the path that the game is traveling. The rest will be taken care.

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Could You please pass Your comments on energy? How can we build up our energy and how can it be retained? In what ways do we lose it and how can it be gained?

The first thing that has to be understood is that you are part of an infinite energy. It is a continuous flow of energy. It never loses, and it never gains; it simply is. If you can remember this, you will never lose energy because an infinite source is continuously available to you.

You are a part of this infinite energy. It is continuously accessible to you. But through time, you forget how to access this energy. You forget what you are apart off. It is as if a wave is thinking that it is separate from the ocean. The wave is just one part of the ocean. It is in continuous access to the ocean because if you see, it and the ocean are one.

Continuously remember that you are part of this energy; feel it, become it. Throughout the day, whatever you may be doing, remember it, feel that you are the infinite. If you can feel this, if you can feel intensely, by and by, you will become aware of the fact that you are not losing energy. The source once again becomes available to you.

This idea of losing energy is one more conditioning which has been given to you by society. We have been taught that if we do something, we are going to get tired. This is not the case. It is the idea which creates this feeling in you; nothing else. If this idea disappears, this feeling disappears along with it.

Our relationship with the infinite is just like the roots of a tree. The roots will suck water from the earth whenever the water runs short. In the same why, we have roots in the infinite. But here, the energy will never run low. Here, the more active you are, the more energy you will have. When you do some activity and use some energy, even more energy than you have used will be 'sucked' from the infinite.

Now, understand that you are not just a wave. Understand that you are the ocean. The whole of life is an ocean; it is oceanic. And if you are a part of this ocean, be oceanic!

Never feel as if you are losing energy. Instead, become aware of the energy which is continuously flowing both in and out of you. Simply becoming aware and the energy will lead the river to the ocean.

Understand?

I have tried to be aware and for sometime I will succeed, but then I tend to forget. It has become a very strong effort in me. So must I continue with this effort, or is it alright to let go once in a while? And if I do let go, is there a technique for which I can remain aware?

Awareness should be from moment to moment. And it can be from moment to moment only if it is effortless. As long as you put in effort, you will lose concentration. As long as there is effort, there will need to be rest.

Effort can never be continuous. How can you make an effort continuously? There will have to be some time when you will get tired and need to relax. And this is the reason why you are forgetting. The mind must always play its game, na?! Because the mind is getting tired and needs rest it is creating the illusion is you that you are losing concentration.

So if awareness comes through effort, understand that this is not awareness. Awareness by its very nature is constant. If you are experiencing only bits of it, how can it be called as awareness?

Life moves with opposites. You make an effort, and you must rest again. The effort will move to the opposite, it will have to rest. There is an awareness that moves beyond life. It is completely effortless. It operates through spontaneity. This is awareness.

Effort will always be only at the periphery. It can never move to the center. You can always make an effort to do something on the periphery, but in order for it to touch the center, spontaneity is needed.

You can change your attitude and behavior. You can become anything that you may want, but this so- called change will only be on the periphery. It will not reach your center. Even reaching the periphery can only be reached through effort.

So the center will not be reached through effort. There can be no effort made to reach you. You are already there; there is no need to do anything! You must simply live in silence, in spontaneity. If you can do this, you will suddenly be thrown to you center. You will realize your awareness. You will see that you are awareness. It is your inherent nature.

You have always been consciousness, you are consciousness and you will continue to be consciousness. This consciousness cannot be taken from you. But it does not exist at the periphery. It exists at the very core of your being.

As of now, we are all living at the periphery; hence it is difficult to reach awareness. Now, our effort to reach awareness is something like an imagination. If effort is there, we must imagine and then feel as if we have achieved something very great. Only when these efforts are dropped, awareness can be reached.

Now the question will be, 'How to reach awareness effortlessly?' You must simply slip into it. It must be a spontaneous happening. When you sit down for your meditation, begin with watching all that is happening outside of you. If thoughts come, let them pass. Do not deny them, and do not run behind them. Simply remain aware of them. Once you have mastered the art of becoming aware on the outside; turn your awareness inwards. Now, watch all that is happening within you. You are able to stay aware of all that is outside of you, so continue to stay aware of it. Now you will watch both the outside as well as the inside.

And I am not saying to only become aware at the time of sitting down in meditation. If this is the case, your awareness is only pseudo. You must be able spontaneously slip into it. Even to do this, initially, effort is needed.

The people who you are with play a major role in the quality of your mind. To easily slip into awareness, it will help to be in the presence of one who is also aware. So if the Master is aware, just being around him is infectious. Just sitting in his presence makes you aware. For this, no effort is needed on your part at all. Just being in the same space will do miracles.

The Master is like an ocean of possibilities. Simply sitting by his side will make available these possibilities in you. It will create the same ripples in you. And if one ripple is created, an ocean can be formed.

But this awareness can only happen in you if there is no effort. In the beginning, an effort is required, otherwise, how will you be able to start? The problem starts when this effort is continued past the starting stages. And when it does this, it creates tension. Because of this tension, your mind will simply drop the idea of awareness in the name of forgetting. As long as the effort is there, this awareness will not be light. It will be a very heavy awareness, not a blissful one.

So if you can drop your efforts and live in the beauty of effortlessness, many possibilities will become open to you. When you are not making any effort to reach anywhere, when there is no goal and no effort, when you are not running after anything, when you are acceptant of everything as they are, the quality of your life will become lighter. You will no longer take things so seriously. You can still go about your lives with the same routine, but now, the rat race will be much lighter.

A small story:

Before going to Europe on a business trip, a man drove his Rolls-Royce to a downtown New York City bank and went to ask for an immediate loan of $5,000. The loan officer requested collateral so the man said, 'Here are the keys to my Rolls-Royce.' The loan officer promptly had the car driven into the bank's underground parking for safe keeping, and gave him $5000.

Two weeks later, the man walked through the bank's doors, and asked to settle his loan and get his car back. 'That will be $5000 in principal, and $15 in interest', the loan officer said. The man wrote out a check and began to walk away. 'Wait sir,' the loan officer said 'while you were away, I found out that you are a millionaire. Why would you need to borrow $5000?'

The man smiled. 'Where else could I park my Roll-Royce in Manhattan for two weeks and pay only $15?"

You can continue to run the rat race, but with an easiness. If you can drop your efforts, you will be able to simply flow with life. I am not saying to give up anything. I am not asking you to come out of your routine. No! I am saying to live your life exactly in the same way which you are living. The only thing is that a new quality should be added.

By simply sitting in the Master's presence, much can happen. The infectiousness of awareness can catch hold of you.

Now, I have not really given you a technique to become aware without effort, because every technique will need effort initially. But I have responded to you. I have hit your real necessity. I have given the necessary a blow. I am not bothered about the question. I am bothered about answering you. The question may be one thing, but the answer required is a totally different thing. If the intellect is present, you will miss the juice of these types of answers.

Simply drop the intellect and receive the blow.

That is more than enough.

First thing: surrender is a total thing. You cannot say that you have half surrendered. It is like a circle. You cannot draw half a circle and say that you have drawn a circle. A circle must be complete. If it is half, then it is not a circle at all; it is something else. So in the same way, surrender must be total. Surrender is also like a circle; it is a spiritual circle. You must surrender from end to end.

This is why I say that if you surrender, I will take care of the rest. I only say that I will take care so that you will surrender completely. But once you have surrendered, there is no need for anything to be done; there is no need for me to do anything. Surrender itself is enough. Everything will be done by surrender itself.

By surrender, it means that you are no more; it means that the ego has dropped. By surrendering, you have dropped your walls; you have dropped your defenses. You become an open space. And once you have become open, the divine is free to pass through you.

The divine is forever present. It is an eternal breeze that continuously blows. It is your walls which block this breeze from entering.

I tell you that I will take care only so you can surrender. If I were to tell you that I will not do anything, surrender will be impossible. So it is easier to surrender to a person in front of you rather than to the whole. If I tell you to surrender to the whole, will you be able to do? No! This is because we exist with our walls and boundaries. We are part of the whole, but fail to recognize this. So surrendering to a person or thing will be much easier.

The relationship between the Master and disciple is one of the most complex yet the most simple of things. It is simply because the relationship exists only on the part of the disciple. On the part of the Master, there is no relationship because the Master does not exist. As of now, it appears that the Master is there. And until you have surrendered, you will continue to feel that the Master is there. After surrender has happened, and you are no more, suddenly you will see the Master has never been there.

The Master is an absence. This absence can be seen only after you yourself have become an absence. As long as you are present, you go on projecting this presence onto the Master. It is your projection. It is not what is there. This is because your ego can only see ego; ego can never recognize a non- ego.

Wherever you look, as long as the ego is there, you immediately project ego. And because of this, even the Master will look like someone; he will appear to be one more ego. Once you have surrendered, the Master will no longer be there. You will suddenly see that this chair will become empty. There will no longer be anyone sitting here and talking to you. But only an absence can recognize an absence.

So the relationship cannot exist on the part of the Master. If the relationship exists, then it means that the Master exists. As long as a person exists, the ego is there. And if the Master has an ego, understand that he is not a Master. If the relationship exists on the part of the Master, he cannot be considered a Master at all.

A Master, if with an ego cannot exist without followers. Followers will be needed to feed the ego. The more the crowd, the better he will feel. If everyone were to suddenly leave him, he would be hurt; rather, the ego would be hurt. If this happens, the whole thing becomes just like a business.

However, a Master who has lost the ego will simply draw crowds to him. There is no effort needed at all. The crowds will simply come, the centers and Ashrams will simply happen! There is no effort involved, you see!

So with a true Master, the relationship exists only on the part of the disciple. You may love him; you may obey him, but be clear that he is not concerned about your love and obedience at all. There is no one to be related. His care is natural; it is infinite; it is unconditional. It is not that anyone has to be there in order for his compassion to flow. It simply flows for no reason. It is a continuous flow.

If compassion only flows when someone is present, understand that this compassion is pseudo. If compassion simply flows with no direction it can be called as compassion. See, compassion is a feeling, a flow; it is an experience which happens within a person when the ego is no more. And this flow happens continuously for the whole of Existence.

The Master is empty, he is a nobody. Once, when I was giving a discourse in a college, during the question and answer session, a girl stood up with a question. She asked me, 'Why is it that we must sit down here and you on that simhasana- thrown?' I simply smiled and told her, 'It is because you are somebody and I am nobody.'

So understand: the Master's presence is emptiness. This emptiness is continuous. Love, compassion goes on flowing to no one or no thing. He cannot choose to love or not to love. He cannot choose to be compassionate or not to be compassionate. It simply flows, that's all! If he can choose, then the I is there, the ego is there. But the Master is not, the disciple is. Until the disciple disappears, the relationship will continue. When the disciple surrenders, he disappears. And when he disappears, he suddenly realizes that the Master has never been with him because the Master never was.

I can say that surrender is the deepest and the greatest relationship possible on the planet Earth. When you surrender, you come to the deepest relationship possible. When you have disappeared, both you and the Master disappear. Understand this one thing: You both will become empty. Two empty spaces cannot be considered as two. You cannot create a boundary between two empty spaces. A boundary cannot be created around emptiness. Two emptinesses become one. Now the relationship also cannot exist, because a relationship can only exist between two people.

Once you have surrendered, everything disappears. The Master and the disciple, both are no more. And once you have surrendered, you will not be able to understand why you were simply moving here and there trying to move out of the ego. You will laugh at the game which the ego has played.

As I have said before, this relationship is very complex because only one exists. The other is not. So really, all of the games which you are feeling with the Master are your games. You have created these games and are projecting it onto the Master.

I am reminded of a story:

Ramakrishna speaks about these great swans; Paramahamsas. These great swans are like enlightened Masters who take a bird body just to go around and see their territory. They are supposed to be a metaphysical bird seen only through enlightened eyes, or the people who are living in the higher consciousness. Of course only if you are enlightened, you will be able to stay in the higher consciousness; that is different!

This bird will lay an egg. In forty percent distance from touching the ground, it will hatch. In sixty percent distance, it will grow wings. Before touching the ground, in ninety percent distance, it will just take off and fly. It will never touch the ground. It will never touch the planet Earth.

So, there is a small story about these great Swans:

When the reflection of the swan falls on lakes, or the ocean, or a river- when the reflection falls on the water, all the fish in the lake start jumping, 'Oh, some new fish has come, some big fish has come.' They all start jumping on the reflection and play with it. Some fish will jump this way, some fish will jump that way.

Some fish will think, 'What a beautiful fish, what a wonderful fish', and they will be jumping this way and that. Some fish will start calling the other fish, 'Hey come quickly, come quick, come and see this beautiful fish, this pretty fish.'

Some fish will even put a fence around, 'Only we can go near this fish quickly.' Some fish who jump in such a way that they jump on the reflection will feel that the fish is hugging them. They will go and write reminiscences, 'Oh, this fish is so great, so loving, radiating compassion; amazing love and compassion.'

Some fish who will jump a little away from the reflection will feel as if the swan is kicking them out; as if the reflection is kicking them out. They will go out and say, 'No, no. This fish is arrogant. He is not as loving as these fellows have told me. In books I read that it was very loving and compassionate; I went there and the reflection was shouting! It is not as compassionate as these fellows say.' So some fish will write, 'No, no. It is very arrogant, condescending', and whatever they feel like.

There are some intelligent fish who will think, 'No! This does not seem to be a fish. It seems to be something else.' These fish are called devotees; very few intelligent fish. They will see, 'No, it is not even something else, it is just a reflection of something.' And they will look up and see the swan flying. These are disciples.

Understand? There are fish that will jump this way and will feel that the reflection is hugging them. They will feel that he is very loving, caring and compassionate. They will go out and write reminiscences. This is one level.

There are some fish that will jump that way and will say, 'No, no, that fish kicked me out. It is not loving or compassionate.' This is one batch.

Some rare, intelligent fish only will look. 'No, this is not even a fish like us. It is something else.'

You see, there is a beautiful sloka in the Gita: whoever thinks that the Guru is a better human being, has abused the divine presence.

The Guru is not a better human being; he is completely disconnected from this very idea of human beings.

So only few intelligent guys get an idea. 'No, he is not a better fish, or big fish, or anything. He is not even the same species which we think. The very quality, the very idea is totally different. Those people who feel this, who are fortunate enough to have that click; only they start becoming devotees. Only they start living around, or start practicing very sincerely whatever has been expressed.

See, the people who come and go, both fish; the fish that claim he is love and compassion and all these things, as well as the fish that jump out and say, 'No, not like that, everything is business.' Both fish are called consumers.

The fish who start looking, who start feeling, 'No, this is not just a fish, it is something else', you are ready to look up and see the source. When you look up and see the original fish, the original swan, you understand the truth. Suddenly you see, you were also never a fish, you were thinking that you were a fish. Suddenly you see, 'Arrey! I am a swan!'

You will fly and play with that swan!

Until you see the swan flying, you do not realize that you too are a swan. You are a swan who by some reason fell into the water and you forgot you can fly and you are just tumbling this way and that, struggling to survive, thinking that you are a fish. This is the truth.

Different types of fish come. There are some fish who are very busy- just jumping this way and that. And when these fish jump this way and that, the reflection starts moving just because of the ripples created by the fish. And these fish will think that the swan is moving.

Understand, one important thing: whether the fish are jumping and moving the reflection, or they are feeling that it is loving and compassionate and hugging them, or they are feeling that everything is business and hating, or if they look a little deep and find out the reality of the swan, you must understand- throughout all of these stages, the swan does not even bother. He is not even touched. He is neither touched nor bothered about all these four steps.

Intelligent are those who can look up and fly.

His reflection falls on the lake for only one purpose. He is just expecting, just seeing if maybe a few fish will look up; that's all! Maybe a few fish will look up.

Understand: the first level, when you jump and say that he is compassionate, you are a fish, and the reflection is also a fish. Or even if you jump out and say, 'No, no, it is not as we think; it is all just foolishness, marketing, again, you are a fish and he is also just one more fish.

The third level, when you look and see, 'No, no, this is not a fish. Then, you are not a fish, and he is also not a fish. He is a reflection, and you are also a reflection of the reflection. That is why you are able to feel that it is something else.

Then, the forth level, when you look up, he is a swan and you are also a swan.

Along with your transformation, you will see the higher experiences of him. And by seeing the higher experiences of him, your transformation will happen; both are internally connected.

When you see the divinity in an idol, it is the first level. When you see the divinity in a living human being, it is called Guru Bhakti. Guru Bhakti suddenly leads to Atma Bhakti. The Guru just turns that same devotion and says, 'What is inside this system is inside that system. Tat tvamasi

The reflection of the swan happens everywhere for the one reason that maybe a few fish will look up. And wherever the reflection falls, automatically, the Ashrams and communities and temples just stand up! You don't even have to do anything, they will just stand up!

If the reflection falls on Malaysia, all the Malaysian fish will gather and the temple will be built! If it falls on Los Angeles, all the Los Angeles fish will gather and the temple will be built! And if the reflection falls on Bangalore, all the Bangalore fish will gather and the temple will be built! If the reflection falls on some other country or city, all the fish will gather and naturally, the temple will be built!

Understand: I always tell people, especially the people who are our organizers, I always tell them, these rituals, rites, the temple, everything is for service, for the public. You fellows understand, do not forget to see the swan. Because some fish are so busy collecting pebbles to add to the height of the temple, they forget to look up and see the swan. Early morning, the swan is no longer there and only empty water will remain. They will be stuck with the memorial they built. The swan has disappeared.

Understand: before the swan disappears, do not forget to look up and see the swan. Sometimes, people just play around and miss. They forget to look up and see the swan, thinking that it is going to be there forever.

So, do not miss.

Thank you.

Part 2: The Mind Game

THE SUPREME PONTIFF OF HINDUISM BHAGAWAN SRI NITHYANANDA PARAMASHIVAM is recognized as the 1008th living incarnation of Paramashiva as per Sanatana Hindu Dharma ("Hinduism") and by His predecessors of enlightened masters and adepts

THE SUPREME PONTIFF OF HINDUISM BHAGAWAN SRI NITHYANANDA PARAMASHIVAM is reviving Hinduism as the 1008th Acharya Mahamandaleshwar (the head for all spiritual leaders) of Atal Akhada (ancient apex body of Hinduism), coronated as Mahamandaleshwar (Supreme Spiritual Head) of Maha Nirvani Akhada (largest apex monastic order) and the youngest Mahamandaleshwar, ordained as the 233rd Guru Mahasannidhanam (Pontiff) of Thondai Mandala Aadheenam, ordained as the 293rd Guru Mahasannidhanam (Pontiff) of Shyamalapeeta Sarvajnapeetam, ordained as the 23rd Guru Mahasannidhanam of Dharmamukthi Swargapuram Aadheenam, and coronated as the 203rd Emperor of Suryavamsa Surangi Samrajyam.

The Srimad Karana Agama, Purva bhaga, Patala 71, Sakalotpatti vidhi, Sloka 8 & 9 (Sacred Ancient Hindu scripture) declares:

इत्येवंनिष्कळं प्रोक्तंपरं भावमिति स्मतमृ ।् सष्टिृ स्थंलोकरक्षार्थं लोकस्योत्पत्तिकारणम।।् साधकानांहितार्थं तुस्वेच्छया गह्ृ णतेतनःु।

In this way (Shiva) who is Nishkala - without any body and parts, who is the Ultimate Supreme Being, who is established in the Creation, who is the Cause of the creation of the Universe, assumes a body out of His Free Will for the protection of the Universe, and for the welfare of the Spiritual seekers and Devotees.

THE SUPREME PONTIFF OF HINDUISM BHAGAWAN SRI NITHYANANDA PARAMASHIVAM is the reigning spiritual emperor of 17 ancient traditional Hindu kingdoms and the reviver of the most ancient, most peaceful, still-living and long-lasting demonstrable system that shows the possibility of peaceful co-existence amongst people. Following the coronation to establish KAILASA worldwide at the age of 16, for the past 27 years, THE SUPREME PONTIFF OF HINDUISM BHAGAWAN SRI NITHYANANDA PARAMASHIVAM, as the face of the unified Hindus, has been single-handedly, tirelessly inspiring the dispossessed Hindu Diaspora to reclaim their Hindu centric freedom and stand unified for the centuries-old Hindu genocide.

The 1008th living incarnation of Paramaśiva, THE SUPREME PONTIFF OF HINDUISM BHAGAWAN SRI NITHYANANDA PARAMASHIVAM stands as the unifying force for the 2 billion born and practicing Hindu diaspora worldwide and established the Hindu State, KAILASA for the persecuted Hindus in over 100 countries.

THE SUPREME PONTIFF OF HINDUISM BHAGAWAN SRI NITHYANANDA PARAMASHIVAM has made resolute efforts towards recognizing and legitimizing the Hindu genocide which has been receiving scant consideration by global leaders and international bodies, THE SUPREME PONTIFF OF HINDUISM BHAGAWAN SRI NITHYANANDA PARAMASHIVAM founded KAILASA Uniting Nations. For the past 27 years, this international body has been responsible in building relations, bridging dialogs, inspiring leaders, uniting nations towards acknowledging the Hindu policies which are universal, life positive as referenced from the ancient text of Hinduism. This is the 'ahimsa' (non-violent) way of bringing acknowledgment to the horrors of the Hindu genocide, the untold facts of the darkest act of mankind on Earth to the most contributing civilization - KAILASA.

KAILASA is an apolitical nation whose vision is enlightened living for all. Towards this goal, KAILASA is the only Hindu nation on planet Earth today bringing legitimacy to the principles of Hinduism. Social principles, economic principles, judicial principles, Hindu medical principles, and Hindu economic principles. KAILASA is THE SUPREME PONTIFF OF HINDUISM BHAGAWAN SRI NITHYANANDA PARAMASHIVAM's response to humanity's global problems of poverty, hunger, illiteracy, disease, violence and global warming and the continuing ethnocide and genocide of over 80 million Hindus worldwide since 7 centuries.

Over the last 50 years, the effects of meditation and its significant impact on stress, crime rates, violence, political decision making and even war in local and global consciousness is well established. Unfortunately, in the last two hundred years, forcibly we are made to believe Hinduism is a functional principle only for enlightenment and spirituality. It is absolutely dysfunctional for the political, social, economical system. Making Hindu family structure, Hindu social structure dysfunctional is the greatest crime done against humanity.

Sanatana Hindu Dharma has faced both historical and ongoing religious persecution and systematic violence, in various forms including assassination attempts on living incarnations, targeted elimination of Hindu pontiffs through bio war and lawfare, cyberbullying, Hindu phobia, forced conversions, documented massacres, demolitions, desecration and grabbing of worship temples and monasteries, looting of Hindu temples properties, destruction of Hindu educational institutions, elimination of well known Hindu libraries, the gross violation to the freedom to practice the Hindu school of liberated thinking (Sankhya), Hindu schools of living enlightenment (Jeevan Mukthi), gross violations of the right to freedom of religion that includes violations of the right to life, personal Hindu integrity or personal Hindu liberty, mass execution, looting and enslavement.

Hinduism was once practiced freely in over 56 nations across the continent from Afghanistan, Bharat, Nepal, Burma, Sri Lanka, all the way to Singapore, Malaysia, and Cambodia and Indonesia, and in 200 states, 1700 samasthanas (provinces) and 10,000 sampradayas (traditions). Over several centuries the combined forces of foreign invasion, political upheaval, colonialism and religious persecution systematically ended millennia of Hindu Swarajya, or self-rule. Today Hindu temples remain in a few countries but the Hindus who worshiped in them have been ethnically cleansed.

The revival of Hinduism through the civilizational nation of KAILASA globally irked vested interests of atheistic terrorist militant elements, caste supremacist terrorists and other anti-Hindu forces who executed a massive persecution and genocide on SPH and His followers on 2 March 2010 that continued for the next whole decade and comprised of over 70 assassination attempts, over 250 sexual assaults on SPH and his monks and disciples, lawfare of 120 false cases over 10 years, massive hate propaganda in electronic media of over 14,000 hours and print media of over 25,000 articles in 5 years, destruction of heritage properties worth over 27 million USD, and the continuing ethnocide and genocide of over 80 million Hindus worldwide since 7 centuries. Specifically, the lawfare involved:

• Delegitimizing SPH by hate propaganda, disenfranchising Him of His civil and human rights, prejudicing Him from fair representation and fair trial
• Repeated illegal imprisonment, with brazen torture, custodial assassination attempts, supported by system justification in various forms, including the common processes of bureaucracy, indifference, self-deception, diffused responsibility and has resulted in continued systemic complicity with torture, murder and genocide
• Well-planned multi-layer false hate propaganda by the 'fourth estate' media sustained by moral disengagement, leaving the broader public in a state of willful ignorance, motivated denial, out-group victim-blaming, dehumanization and bystander apathy to even genocide.

THE SUPREME PONTIFF OF HINDUISM BHAGAWAN SRI NITHYANANDA PARAMASHIVAM stands in solidarity with the untold, multi-level social, political, intellectual, religious, cultural, linguistic, economic, legal, digital persecution done to Hinduism and faced by Hindus and Hindu minorities worldwide for the past several thousands of years continues through the modern day. THE SUPREME PONTIFF OF HINDUISM BHAGAWAN SRI NITHYANANDA PARAMASHIVAM has been recently acknowledged by the United Nations for the persecution of The SPH and the KAILASA global community, especially the affected women and children.

The KAILASA with de facto spiritual embassies operating across over 100 countries and having presence across the globe as the largest spiritual knowledge source on Hinduism is spiritually governed with the life positive, all-inclusive, universal policies sourced from Hinduism revived by THE SUPREME PONTIFF OF HINDUISM BHAGAWAN SRI NITHYANANDA PARAMASHIVAM. Having enriched and enreached more than one billion individuals over the past 27 years the KAILASA raises the voice to protect Hindus, defend Hindus and preserve the Hindu narrative for the world.