15. Experiment With The Truth

My search for spiritual truth began when I was about 10 years of age.

My family went to see Annamalai Swami, an ascetic and a close disciple of Ramana Maharishi, the great enlightened master who lived in my hometown, Tiruvannamalai, many years back.

I went there to listen to Annamalai Swami giving a discourse, although secretly I was waiting for the candy that he would give at the end of the discourse. Annamalai Swami was talking to a group of seekers. On that particular day, in his discourse, he was saying that we are not the body but something beyond it. He further explained that pain and suffering are beyond the body. They do not affect us. I forgot all about the candy.

I was surprised to hear this theory. I immediately thought, 'When my mother slaps me, I feel the pain. Then, why is he saying otherwise?'

His words continued to ring in my ears. I had an intense urge to experiment and verify his words. I ran back home, took a knife and cut my thigh with it. It started to bleed and I was in terrible pain. My parents were livid. They rushed me to a hospital. I still have that scar on me. After a few days, I went back to meet the Swami.

I said, 'Swamiji, you told us that we are beyond the body, and pain and suffering don't exist. But, when I cut my thigh, it bled, and I had intense pain. Why?'

The Swami was surprised to hear of my experiment. He was very compassionate. He consoled me and taught me a simple meditation technique. All I had to do was to search for the source of my thoughts or see where my thoughts began. Though I had never meditated before, I decided to try it out.

Gradually, I realized that endless thoughts in our mind formed the first hurdle for spiritual growth. We all have problems with our thoughts. They seem to go one way when we want them to be another way. When we are at work, we are thinking about home. At home we think of work. When we greet people, we are thinking of something else. We edit when and what we speak.

Just be a little aware! If we are established in the truth, our inner chatter and outer chattering will disappear. All our thoughts and thinking will disappear. If we are completely truthful, we never have to think, we just need to be and relax. Why do we need to continuously think?

If we have to prepare continuously, whatever we prepare is a lie. When we speak too much, please be very clear that we are lying. We are hiding the truth. We are decorating a lie. Start becoming aware today.

Be aware! Be blissful! Experiment with the Truth I have told you just now and you will experience liberation from your very mind.