38. 74. Body language

That day Einstein was to deliver an explanatory lecture about E=mc in a very big university. As Einstein had to come from some other town, he didn't arrive in time.

Einstein's car driver thought he could help the situation, so he put on Einstein's clothes and got on to the dais.

It was a new town. The driver was also a graduate. The driver had listened to Einstein whenever he explained about E=mc2 at several places, remaining by his side.

Speaking just like Einstein without leaving even a single point, he spoke fluently as he knew all the points by heart.

As the crowd believed that it was Einstein only who was talking, they clapped joyfully at the end of the talk.

Next day, the problem began. A university professor asked a very complicated question about E=mc and the driver became frustrated. This was new to him. It was unexpected.

Since the driver had no dialogue or reply ready made for this new situation he was beginning to struggle. At the very moment Einstein entered the room.

Saying, 'I don't reply for such an ordinary question. For this my car driver himself will give the reply.' The driver invited Einstein to the dais and escaped.

• What would have been the condition of the driver if Einstein had to come after some delay? Driver's bluff would have got exposed through his staggering body language! All those times, when we undergo feelings of stress and irritation due to some crisis situations are all only such moments.

In those situations when we do not have some ready made dialogues or the required intelligence, our true colors will get exposed outside through our body language.

---

The one that splits the body and mind is ego.

• What the mind thinks of expressing the man does not at all express through his body gestures.
• All of man's gestures come out mixed with his ego only.
• It is only our inability to express things which we think of expressing actually, which sows the seed for others misunderstanding us.

I love you more than my life!

• o Then how come you are still alive?

Oh king, you delivered me!

• o How is it possible grandma, for me to deliver you?
• You have let me down! I did not expect this from you!
  • o Why do you say such a bad lie?

My stomach itself is burning!

• o I will be very angry if you talk like this irrelevantly. It will be a pity if people begin speaking like this. Things related to consciousness and experiences are very difficult to express in words.

All the above dialogues are mostly known to everybody. On many occasions, we act and exhibit ourselves as though we have expressed our feelings correctly through such ready made dialogues.

But the truth is that feelings cannot be expressed in words totally.

When we communicate information to a person, we can convey through our words only 10% of the matter.

What about conveying the balance information to the other person? It is being expressed only through the body language – Today's researchers agree on this very clearly.

It is very sad that today's education system that gives importance to the spoken word only which expresses a mere 10% of the information, does not give the same importance to body language, which expresses as high as 90% of the information.

This state of ignorance of not giving importance to body language should change.

For love, quality and nature to shine like a beacon light, the awareness about 'body language' should grow.

Body language is not an art that an individual can learn and then practise. It is basic for every one's life.

During the inter-personal relationships of ourselves with our near and dear, we realize that some thing which we expect in them is either present or absent in them. That particular thing is only the body language.

If it is to be explained further, when there happens to be some friction in our relationships, the trend of the conversation will be as follows:

'To the extent I show my love and affection to you, you don't show towards to me. To the extent you are saying you love, you don't show love towards me.'

'Why me?'

'Can I not get a single relationship which is true and real?'

'Love and affection are all outward show, mere words only.'

There is nothing to complain against you; you support me, show affection to me; even then, I continue to have a feeling that there is something still incomplete in our relationship....

What is that will complete it and give satisfaction?

That's only the sufficiencies and deficiencies of the body language.

For a person to be a receptionist in a company there are rules prescribed as to how sweet the words and body language should be in order to attract the customer.

When a person sees such an individual, while working as a receptionist, for that person, the receptionist will appear to be a very nice person.

But in reality, the chances of that receptionist being so nice and sweet are very low.

In order to efficiently perform the job of a receptionist, adopting good body language like welcoming with a smile, bowing, enquiring with politeness and love, not exhibiting any negative feelings on the face under any type of circumstances, in a mechanical way, is enough. The customer will be satisfied.

There are more chances for the receptionist to exhibit good body language merely for the sake of getting her pay cheque. She may exhibit this polite behavior mechanically just for the sake of her job. In reality she may not be a polite person.

But each and every customer thinks always that he has been well received and properly looked after.

Because, the entire world lies in wait craving for a wholesome and complete conscious feeling. That is why, when we come across pleasant body language, we feel happy.

When the man feels so happy for a small incident of receiving, which lasts only a few minutes, if we show the fullness of our love and affection to our relations, who remain with us life-long, how happy they will be?

Think it over a little. The benefit will be great!

For the purpose of getting a job, education, opportunities or some sort of help, all of us would have exhibited polite and sweet body language to others and would have achieved the required results.

For very ordinary things, for somebody unknown, when we are able to bend ourselves and our understandings – why can't we change ourselves for the sake of some of our relatives whom we love fully and dearly?

Even if we had not so far exhibited humility truly in our body language towards those close to us, at least hereafter we can show it out.

It is not a very big task to add sweetness to our body language and make others happy.

Understand deeply that 'body language' occupies a very large place in human relations, in fullness of love and in satisfaction. Add sweetness to the 'body language'. It is sufficient. You will understand the blissful formula for social living.

---

A meaningful incident.

Tenali's wife said, 'You should correct certain things in yourself. While you talk intelligently with many, with some you behave like a fool.'

With his eye movement itself Tenali asked, 'With whom?'

Tenali's wife replied, 'With me and my children'.

Without using his words just with his facial expression he looked at his wife as if to say, 'O Fool!'

The wife babbled foolishly saying, 'Hereafter, you must behave wisely to us as well.' He looked at her arrogantly.

The love which appeared in Tenali's eyes, affection in his face, the pity expressed in his body language – For the sake of these, it was usual for Tenali's wife to rejoice and relax when conversing with Tenali in this manner.

The research scientists' opinion is:

When you converse,

Your words convey only 7% of the information. Your voice and feelings convey 35% of the information. Your body-language conveys 58% of the information.

---

Meditation chisels. Chisel No. 29.

To become a king of your home, you should become a king of your mind.

How much we hang on and cajole a person until the work for which he has been approached, is completed. We show humility, we smile cheerfully at him!

This is all until the job is completed. No matter what happens we will remain patient to the maximum extent possible. Have you noticed this?

In regard to those close to us, whatever wrong happens, even though it is very small, immediately we will pounce on them. Instantly we would lose our patience.

Have you observed this also?

If you pounce on your relatives for small mistakes and remain calm when a stranger does the same mistake you may conclude that you don't remain a king of your mind.

The titles such as head of the household and queen of the house should not just stop at the level of being simple entries on the ration (identity) cards. It should become true and real.

The man, who remains patient with a third person, is not prepared to be patient in regard to his relatives.

One who is patient, rules the earth. This is the truth.

It will be raining money in the cash chest of one who laughs just for money. Good body language will attract money of course. These are not big things.

Being a king or becoming a king is not a big thing. But remaining as a king of your home is a great thing.

To become a king of your home, first of all, you should become the king of your own mind.

---