29. Do not find pleasure in causing distress to others.

• Those who take up others to task in great measure for small mistakes do not try to praise even a little for great good actions.
• They make big of small mistakes. When the same job is done correctly and without any mistakes, they do not bother about it.
• When a person scolds somebody duly pointing out the faults, 'the feeling of guilt' created within him will spur him to correct himself.

The mind of the person, who has corrected himself after hard exertions, will wait with eager expectations of recognition for all the efforts taken by him.

But, the person, who was ready to point out the mistakes, will move away and will not even bother to look at the excellence.

This will make the person who tried to correct himself lose his heart, and as a consequence, he goes on correcting himself continuously.

The man who started to correct himself will feel disappointed.

• Scold a person who has not corrected himself until he does not correct himself; After he has corrected himself, still tackle the person who has corrected himself.

To live with a person of this attitude and action, is equivalent to life in hell. The behaviour of giving your neighbour some sort of sadness for whatever he does should and must be stopped.

It is of course an undeniable fact that many have done and are still doing the above mentioned unjustified actions. In the same manner, what proof is there for you to show that you have not done similar bad deeds for many people?

You know very well as to who have affected you. But about the persons who are affected by you.... you do not know.

Continuously making others live in distress is the action of a mind in distress. Bringing a stop to the action of giving distress to others will bring to an end the distress in your own mind.

The remedy for all your distress is yourself only.

During the times of onset of distress, the distressed state of mind peeps out. When you face distress, don't get upset. Let the distress occupy you fully. The rule of meditation is:

'When peak of distress is reached, it will disappear.'

Hereafter, make all future times of distress as times of meditation. Awaken yourself when the thought to cause distress to others arises in your mind. Come out by conquering that thirst, with awareness.

Unjust things within you will disappear and you will blossom into a just and fair person.

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59. Your view and the life's flow.

A happy family had come on that day to our Bidadi Ashram at Bangalore.

A smart little boy of that family had done some small mistake. The grandma got a little angry and asked: Have you got sense?

The boy's father also said to him: Have you got at least a little sense?

The boy, who was scolded, instead of becoming calm and subdued, clapped his hands and laughed at them.

When asked why he laughed he said: Master, in our house when my mother cooks and she does not have a certain ingredient for the cooking, I have watched my mother asking the neighbours 'Have you got this ingredient?', 'Have you got at least a little of this?' Today they are asking me, 'Have you got sense?' Poor people, it appears that they do not have sufficient sense.

So saying, he began to laugh again.

• For a joyful person, it will be clear that happiness is lying scattered fully in the field of life.------------

• To you.... Who has told you that life is sorrowful? Who can tell you that life is blissful? Both these things, you only have to tell yourself.

• Ruining you... Protecting you... Both of the above, nobody else can do more than what you can do to yourself.

• 'I am this type of person.' 'Things I like.... things I don't like...' 'As far as I am concerned...' That part of the mind which gives you such ideas and opinions clearly, is only called personality.

• You don't see any thing through the eyes. It is only through your personality that you see every thing. You understand every thing. It is only because of that the opinions of one person is not like that of the other. The reason for this is that the personality differs from person to person.

One small story.

At the entrance to the city of Venice, an old man was sitting under a tree. He was an enlightened Master.

One passer-by came to him and asked: Sir, what is the nature of people in this city?

The old man asked: Where are you coming from? What is the nature of people in your town?

He answered: I am coming from Queen City. Those who live there are very bad. Not even one person knows how to behave lovingly. They don't understand others.

The old man said: It is a good thing, you asked me. Even the people, who are here, are very bad. Nobody will understand you. Immediately escape from here and go away.

After some time another passer-by came to him and asked: Sir, what type of people are here in this city?

The old man asked: Wherefrom do you come? How are the people of your town?

This passer-by answered: Sir, I come from Queen City. They are very nice people, very loving. They understand one another and adjust and accommodate others.

Old man said: Good! The people here also are of the same nature. They are also very nice people. You have come to the right place only.

This story is a very nice example to show that:

In whatever state we are, we look upon others with the same state or view.

The first passer by wrongly believes that his town people are bad.

Basically, a person who possesses fine qualities will also consider others as fine. Because of that only, for the man who comes from the same town, people of the same town look fine.

'Good people' again and again search and find out the good qualities in others and feel happy about it. They maintain a good relationship as well.

'Bad people' again and again search and find out the bad qualities in others and feel sad. They spoil the good relationships also.

Every thing has got a colour. If every thing appears green, where is the problem? Is it with everything? Or is it with the person who sees it?

Certainly, the problem is with the person who sees it.

The green glass he puts on is only the problem.

This green glass is nothing but your personality.

To whatever measure your personality is, you will be able to understand others to the same extent.

If every thing appears green, it can be only that your spectacles are green in colour. Not the articles.

In the same manner, if many people in this world appear in some way or the other, as not all right or bad, then there is a problem in your personality only. Not with others.

If the personality becomes all right, without wrongly estimating others, you can understand them correctly.

This is good; this is bad. This is wrong, this is right.

This will vary accordingly to each and every religion. Many things that appear as right and that, which gives happiness, will appear as bad and unnecessary for elders.

If you look individually, everybody is good.

If others good qualities are not instantly appealing, and only others bad qualities are conspicuous to a person, then there should be some thing wrong in one's outlook to life.

If you have a clear feeling about yourself as good and nice person, then other people's good qualities will instantly strike you.

Whatever faults you find with others, more than 10% of them will be the faults within us. Only such faults will instantly strike you.

Whatever faults you find with others, more than 90% of them will be the faults within us only.

Take a small paper and jot down what are all the faults you find in others. Examine that list thoroughly and observe. The truths stated above will be understood.

Many of our faults have gone and settled deep into our minds. Therefore it may be rather difficult for many to accept this.

Whether you accept it or not, the truth remains, that 'you find your own faults only in others.'

It is enough if you correct the faults you found from the list. Your personlity will become very clear. Only then the truth that others are also good is known to us.

Then, after that, little by little, we will begin to understand as to how others are good and how wrongly we had understood them.

Jesus has given a beautiful statement for this. 'First of all remove the big wooden rafter from your eyes; then remove the piece of straw from your brothers' eye.'

In this statement what He has referred to as a rafter is not an exaggerated matter. It is the real truth.

Most people spend their life only by pointing an accusing finger at others while they possess very big faults, wrongs, uncontrolled feelings and falsehood.

If only I had good parents...

If not,

If I had a good wife or had good children or had good friends or had a good job or had a good boss….

Like this, we throw the blame on others and retain our own faults in tact.

Your faults are the tumors of your mind. Accepting your faults is equivalent to removal of the tumor by surgery. It is rather difficult only to accept one's faults. Surgery will be painful only. But there is no other go.

It may be possible by making the shields made of your name and fame, status and command to see that your faults and tumors are not visible outside. What is the use of this? Tumor may accumulate some more pus. Your faults will get worse.

Depending on your mental condition only, your health will be formed. If the faults of the mind go on gathering more and more pus, the body will also become worse day by day.

This is the reason why as a person grows old there are more diseases. Whatever is the condition of your health today and whatever be the number of faults you have, it is enough if you understand that the major reason for your grief, dis-contentment, bodily sufferings and diseases is your personality only.

This by itself will give you an independent feeling and joy. When the mental point of view becomes corrected, the run of life will also become smooth. Peace and joy will flow!

Meaningful incident.

A friend once asked Mullah Nasruddin, 'How to approach life, tell me.' Nasruddin beautifully said, 'If you have a positive approach independence and joy happens within you, you will feel highly satisfied.

When the positive things within you increase, you will be able to see firstly the positive and good aspects of others only. It will be known that you are surrounded by very nice and good people.

You can approach life in two ways. One – 'Life is very much sorrowful'. The other, 'Life is very blissful'.

• Man never tries to change his method of approach. The reason: He believes that he is happy. This idea must break.

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Meditation Chisels. Chisel No. 14,

In love and enmity the truths maybe lies as these depend on the fabrications of the mind!

It so happens that you get to read just two pages of a full novel.

If you wish to tell the entire story of that novel from these two pages only, how will it be? Will it be a story at all?

There will not be any connection between the true novel and the story that you have fabricated. It is impossible too!

Do you know yourself fully?

Think about it.

Others are like you only. When they themselves do not know about their own selves they talk…

'That man is like this...

This man is bad...

He is good ...'

There will be very little truth in all such opinions that you express about his character.

One person cannot describe about another person. Still if you do, your description about a person as good or bad – both descriptions are false only. These are only fabrications which appear beautiful and seem to have exact resemblances.

All your love and enmity only have these fabrications as their basis. You fabricate others only according to your own mind's views.

Result:

You may believe an enemy as a friend.

You may believe a friend as an enemy.

Reason: You don't really know about a real man at all!

How long you will live with fabrications?

If you really want to live, want to grow...

Throw away both good and bad types of fabrications.

Become a bold person to meet the true man, the true woman.

Do away with all sorts of descriptions.

The beautiful display of colours of life will begin to appear.

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• Understanding only is wisdom.
• Man struggles and suffers only because of his wrong understanding of what he has created in his mind about life and relationships.
• Incorrect understandings are graves getting formed in the mind.
• If all the questions and doubts of the man have to be resolved in only one word, then it is only 'understand'!

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A logistician asked the lady Zen Master, Shalana: What is unavoidable to man?

Shalana said: Death.

The man asked: What has to be won over by man?

For this also Shalana said: Death.

The man further asked: What is the root cause for man to get entangled in various problems?

Shalana said: Death.

• Unavoidable Death of the body. What has to be won over? – Death of the mind.

That which has to be corrected – Death of life.

If the ego, which totally controls body, mind and soul, dies, every thing will become all right.

The medicine which destroys ego: UNDERSTANDING.

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'One cannot understand a woman's mind.'

Is it possible to understand a man's mind?

'Woman's mind is very deep.'

Then is a man's mind within reachable distance? With what instrument did you measure?

It will be embarrassing if we ask the poets who write exaggeratedly about women.

As a matter of fact, nobody can ever understand anybody else's mind. The reason is that the mind is deep only. So nobody can understand the mind easily. This will apply to men as well as women.

Beauty of the soul will be visible in the face. The niceties of the inner feelings will be visible on the facial expressions. When a person has severe stomach ache to the extent of giving considerable pain, and if he tries to laugh, how will that laugh be?

It will only be pretence. However much he tries to speak and laugh normally, the expression of his pain will surely be evident in his facial expressions.

When ordinary stomach pain makes a change in our facial expressions...

To what extent the mental pain, which is present in every one of us, and known only to us, affect our facial expressions as also the way of our expressions? To what extent will it affect our social life? Think well.

The soul gets pungent, becomes decreased in goodness, ego gets strengthened further and further the mental pain increases.

Sudden outburst of anger, Unanticipated frustration, Anxiety without any specific reason, Hatred that comes without any specific purpose.

All the above are the very important symbols of a person's soul getting pungent and it being affected by ego.

Anger, agitation, anxiety, and hatred – all these are the expressions of ego only.

After taking a bath in the sea, we have to take bath in fresh water. Otherwise, the layer of salt which has formed itself on the body will spoil our peace of mind. Particularly, if there is a wound on our skin and if the sea water comes in contact with that, there will be no limit to the irritation we get.

Ego does the same job within us. It is only because the ego creates the wounds in our minds, mental pain and suffering happen even in ordinary aspects of life.

Prithviraj is an average person suffering from mental pains. His nature is such he wishes nobody should suffer due to him and also that he should not in any way harm others.

But, what a pity...

He did not live as he wished even for a day.

That day, Raj, who had returned home, vexed with some problems he had faced in his office, poured out all his disgust on his family members and then returned to his normal self. He got angry even for small mistakes of his children.

One hour later, even if his children did certain things not to his liking, he will softly say: See child, you should not do things like this. You can take liberty in our house, but if you do this any where else outside our house, you will earn a bad name for yourself and for me. Do you understand?

So saying he coolly solved that problem.

'Are these really children at all Oh...One heat-branding mark for a bull, one single word for a good boy...Either you should know by yourself, or you should listen and accept advice from others. Oh! These children are born, without either of these, only to torture me...'

The same man, who, an hour earlier, had humiliated and tortured one and all in the house saying, 'As is the mother, so are the children...' has now become very normal and calm.

Raj came for psychological consultation. He began saying, 'There is quarrel very often in my house. Even my wife and children do not understand me. Even yesterday....'

'Yesterday, one hour earlier there was quarrel in your house. But you did not suffer nor were affected when the children behaved the same way an hour later. For the same condition, earlier you had suffered but later did not suffer, which means with whom is the real problem?' I asked.

After thinking for some time, Raj replied, 'The problem is with me only....!'

I asked, 'Yesterday, before you became angry, what was the state of your mind?'

After thinking for quite some time, he said, 'I was in a disgusted state of mind due to problems at work.'

Because Raj was rather intelligent, he understood very clearly whenever each matter was explained to him.

I further explained to him, 'Since you were in a very low mood, even ordinary actions of others seemed to affect and bother you. On your returning home, after an hour, your mental pain had subsided. You had come back to normal conditions. Therefore even if others behaved in such a manner to make you angry, you did not become angry. The reason for your problem is your mental wound only. Do you understand?'

That person who was complaining, 'Nobody understands me' returned home motivated and inspired and with the satisfaction of having got the answers to his problems, knowing, 'My soul had become pungent and had become wounded. That was the reason for my problem. First of all I should understand myself....'

Mental wound will be there to the same measure as the ego. Mental pain will be there to the same measure as there is mental wound.

Fights and quarrels will continue to be there to the same extent as that of mental pains.

Keeping yourself as the center and having the fights, quarrels and disturbances happening outside as your guidance, find out the extent and measure of the mental pain within yourself. You will come to know the potency and strength of your ego.

Try to reduce the pungency of your being or soul. The well being of the soul will begin to increase automatically. Family life will be a happy one.

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A meaningful incident.

• A Zen story which gives the answer for the question, 'Which one is ego?' The astronaut, who returned from trip to the moon, gave the stones he had brought from there to his Master.

When the Master asked, 'Oh fool, a lot of stones like these are there in our garden itself. Did you use a rocket to bring this?' the astronaut got pained sharply somewhere.

The Master explained, 'The cause for your pain is only your ego.'

Search for the reason. You will discover the ego.

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Meditation chisels. Chisel No. 15.

Having known every thing, you wish only to act as though you don't know any thing....deep in your mind!

Psychologists say: Whatever happens around you, only 2% of it comes to your attention.

In that case who is responsible for the balance 98% not coming to your attention?

The same doctors who expressed the above truths, also say 'Though only 2% gets registered in your conscious mind, in your sub-conscious mind, everything that happens gets registered continuously.'

If through hypnotism, we take an accident victim upto the sub-conscious mind, he is able to say what all happened around him.

He is a person who knows every thing. He is able to say about the car which knocked him down in a second, its number, colour of car, sticker; even the small scratches on the car.

After waking him up from hypnotic state, when he is in his conscious state, if enquired about the same accident, he struggles to say even the type of car which knocked him down.

Having known every thing, he remains a person not knowing any thing.

Does it not appear strange that he is talking as though he does not know any thing about a thing known to him fully? Though strange, it is a fact.

What is that which makes a man believe he knows nothing while he knows every thing? What makes him act like that?

It is only the mental desire, which likes to be dull and lazy.

It is only a part of the ego.

It will appear surprising for you to read this. But this is the truth.

It is sufficient if your level of consciousness increases from 2 % to 3 %.

Your illusory desire will come to light.

If this is recognized just once, it is enough. The illusory curtain lying between known and unknown things will disappear easily. So begin to remove it.

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