52. Q: We often wonder, whatever is happening to us, is it fate or is it our choice?

A very commonly asked question!

Your present moment is the totality of all your past decisions. Now you are here in this place. You decided to wake up early in the morning, take the proper route, come here, sit, and continue to sit, am I right?

Like this, all your past decisions form your present – like being here right now. Your future is going to be a result of all your present decisions. When we make our decisions unconsciously and don't expect some of the results that come our way, we call it fate.

When we make conscious decisions, we are aware of the sideeffects and after-effects. When we are not aware of the sideeffects and after-effects, we call it fate. Actually, life is pure choice. It is we who make the decisions; never somebody else for us. May be a few major things in your life is driven by fate. But even those can be changed. Attributing every small thing to fate is pure escapism.

God is so gracious, even though the world is His, He allows us to have our choice! The only way you can make the right decisions is by infusing awareness into your very breath so that every action of yours, every decision of yours, happens with awareness and you never slip into any subconscious or unconscious decisionmaking. Then you don't have to worry about fate and destiny.

Drop the fear of insecurity

Understand one more thing: No one is waiting to lay their hands on your wealth and cause you so-called ill-fate. Somehow, we live with the constant fear that people are waiting to rob us of our wealth. It is not true.

In this fear, we build many walls around us. Finally we find ourselves entrapped in our own cell. That is why I say, 'Open the door, let the breeze in.' Have faith that the life force will take care of you. I am not saying 'Don't lock your house!' You need to lock your house. But after locking, drop the obsession with the lock, that's all!

Just take for example, you are traveling in a train. As soon as you settle down in your compartment, what do you do? You start conversing with the person next to you. You ask them where they are from. You try to make out what religion they might believe in. You ask questions about their background etc. Why? Are you genuinely interested in their details? No! It is because you see them as unknown and if you know all these things about them, psychologically you feel comfortable traveling with them, that's all.

If you are a Hindu and they are also Hindu, you feel relaxed. If you are Hindu and you find out that they are Muslim, you start feeling uneasy and afraid; you start eyeing them suspiciously. You might even start thinking about changing your seat. This is how your fear works. You are always unconsciously in fear of losing something.

Sharada Devi, Ramakrishna Paramahamsa's divine consort says, 'Trust others even if you are exploited. The very quality of trusting the universe will make you live like God on Earth.'

When intellect sharpens, you will be able to understand like a scientist. When emotions sharpen, trust flowers. When feelings sharpen, enlightenment flowers! So drop your fears and allow understanding and trust to happen in you.

Drop your fears about your property. Everything belongs to Existence. You are a temporary possessor of it, that's all. If you relax into this understanding, it is enough.

Fear strokes

Q: Swamiji**, when we have fear, you ask us to be more aware of it and look into it. But sometimes, the fear is so sudden That it comes and goes like a sudden shock. We won't have time to even look into it.**

You are talking about what is called a fear stroke.

Fear strokes are short spikes of fear. They just come and go in a few micro seconds' time. For example, you may be walking on the road. Suddenly you see a rope and think it is a snake. You experience a sudden rise of fear, which subsides in just a few seconds because by that time, you realize it is only a rope. This is a fear stroke!

There is always a current of fear in us. At times, it rises to a peak, that's all. These fear strokes can happen with great intensity although they are for a very short duration of time. Fear strokes weaken the immune system. They release depression-inducing chemicals and even accelerate our ageing process. They are believed to even cause a heart attack or make our hair turn white.

On an average, they say that every individual has about 6 fear strokes a day consciously or unconsciously. Examples of fear strokes would be the telephone ringing well past midnight, or while in the car, a motorist suddenly swerves to your side, or when you are watching a horror movie and someone taps you on your shoulder… so many things like this.

You get fear strokes in your dreams also, but you forget them when you wake up. Fear strokes are like shaking the roots of the rose plant. It is very dangerous for the system.

As you said, at the time of the fear stroke, you will not have any time to go into awareness. You won't have time to chant any God's name and go through it. But after the fear stroke, you can very well analyze the stroke and get a deeper imprint of the understanding of your fears. This will help in dissolving the whole idea of fear.

The intensity and frequency of fear strokes can be greatly reduced by reducing the intensity and the depth of the regular fear that is in us. Only from this regular fear, the fear strokes arise. If deeper understanding and clarity can reduce the regular fear, the fear strokes will also reduce.

Fear in general, is so overpowering that it can completely throw you out of control.

A small story:

A disciple kept bothering a Sufi master to give him an initiation.

Finally the master told him that he would initiate him on the condition that he went into the nearest town and kissed a woman in burkha and proceeded to the forest beyond to beat a tiger with his stick.

The other disciples protested saying that this was too simple.

The master just smiled and asked them to wait.

A week later the disciple returned. He was terribly wounded and bleeding.

The master asked him what had happened.

The disciple said, 'I don't know why, but I beat the woman and kissed the tiger!'

Fear can simply blind you! It can take away your thinking and intelligence altogether for a few moments. That is why you need to deeply understand fear and overcome it.

In so many cases, when there is some fire or some calamity happening, people will be running in all directions out of fear. They will be opening doors in the wrong direction. They will be running towards the wrong exit although they know that it is not the right exit. Fear is so blinding.

Just as lust can change to love through awareness, fear can change to fearlessness and intelligence out of pure awareness.

298 Anything suppressed only takes up another form. It doesn't get uprooted totally. So suppression is not the way to overcome fear. Awareness is the way. In fact, if you suppress fear, you are missing the chance of overcoming it.

When you continuously look into your fears with awareness, even when death comes, you will look into it with awareness and allow it to happen to you. It is important to be able to do this because ultimately all your fears are nothing but the fear of death. When you work on your day-to-day fears, your fear of death unconsciously decreases, and when your fear of death decreases, your day-to-day fears decrease! It is a virtuous cycle.

We will now do a beautiful meditation called the Nirbhaya Dhyana, to work directly upon our fears.

Emotion: Fear

Chakra: Swadhishthana chakra

Location: 2 inches below the navel

In Sanskrit, swadhishthana means 'where your being is established' – from swa which means 'self' and adhishthana which means 'established'.

This chakra is locked by fear, especially the fear of death and it can be made to flower by facing fear; by facing death itself.

Meditation Technique to face the fear: Nirbhaya Dhyana – a technique from Vedanta

The Darkness Meditation