From Worrying to Wondering

In a certain kingdom, it came to the king's notice that everybody was depressed, because they found themselves burdened with more than their fair share of worries, while no one else seemed to have any major worries at all. So the king announced a mega 'Worry Exchange Offer', where people could trade their big worries for others' minor ones. A vast space was made ready, in the center of which stood a giant Worry Pot. Here each person could happily dump his own worries and pick up the worries of anyone else they chose. The entire kingdom gathered for the event. Strangers met and starting talking to each other. In due course, the event was declared open. Not surprisingly, not a single person came forward – for who wants to drop his small, familiar worries, and take on the unknown worries of another instead?

The mind is the master of Worry! Before we can move towards easing worry, we need to figure out just what happens inside us when we worry. Just watch your mind when you are worrying about something. What is taking place? You'll find that a continuous stream of thoughts is

pouring through you mind - mostly negative, totally disconnected. In fact, we all indulge in two kinds of speech – 'speaking out' and 'speaking in'. Speaking to others is what we normally call

speech. But what about the soundless inner conversations that

we constantly carry on with ourselves? This continuous, uncontrolled inner chatter, that takes possession of your being without your control, is the gift of the Mind - the source of all worry. This inner chatter is your true master.

With inner chatter, there is no cessation of speech, never a moment's respite. It is a kind of madness. Often, speaking to others is just a way of escaping from one's own being, from one's inner chatter. That's why so much talking is going on in the world!

It's not easy to understand what is meant by inner chatter, is it? Try this experiment: Sit down with your eyes closed. Don't focus on any issue. In just a few moments, you'll find that there is a continuous stream of thoughts flowing through your mind. Write down, honestly, whatever thought come into your mind. Do this for five minutes.

Now, sit down and read what's written on that paper.

Shocked by what you read? This is the record of your inner chatter. How disconnected your thoughts are! Irrelevant, contradictory and defying explanation. Now do you see what a full-fledged lunatic asylum you are running inside your head? This is your true nature of your mind – this completely uncontrolled flow of thoughts, this expression of insanity. This is the mind you have entrusted your life to! This is the mind that has invented all your worries. It is this mind that is living your life for you. Simply understand this much, and you have already taken a quantum leap towards freedom from worry.

A small story:

Nitti Mudaliar once purchased a new car and went off on his first ride. On and on he went, mile after mile through the city. People watched in admiration, but Nitti was in a frenzy of fear. Soon after he launched out, he realized that he knew everything about how to run the car – except how to stop it!

Luckily for everybody, the car finally came to a stop after colliding with a tree.

A stunned passerby enquired of Nitti, "What's wrong with you? Don't you know how to drive?"

"Of course I do", cried Nitti indignantly, "I only don't know how to stop!"

In fact, Nitti was actually not driving the car – he was being driven by it. The car was in control, not he. To drive is to have the ability to make the car move and stop in accordance with your will, not vice-versa.

In much the same way, you are 'driving' a vehicle which you don't know how to stop - your Mind. Just try to stop, even for a moment, your inner chatter. Can you? When you try, the gushing of thoughts becomes even more uncontrollable. It's as if you are fastened with a seatbelt and the vehicle is free to move in any direction it pleases. At least, in a physical accident, you stand to lose only one body, one life – but when we become slaves to our inner chatter, we could spend life after life being taken for a ride. And be driven through life like a madman – with no purpose, no awareness, not even an understanding of what the result is going to be.

When does worry be- Depression is nothing but the clinical name for chronic worry.

What is chronic worrying?

The mind is an excellent recording system. It stores your negative thought patterns,

your complexes, your worries. Whatever you teach the mind, it learns and repeats faithfully. So watch what you tell your mind! For instance, suppose you experience a failure in business. To make it worse, your marriage breaks up around the same period. Chances are that you'll begin to believe that something is wrong with you, that whatever you touch is bound to be a failure. By continuously repeating this negative idea to yourself, you help it get even more deeply rooted in you memory. And as time passes, the mind begins to automatically play back whatever you have taught it, even in other situations, disturbing you without your knowledge or permission. This becomes a habit for your mind, resulting in a serious inferiority complex. Just as poor eating habits ultimately cause fat deposits to accumulate in your body, or cholesterol to accumulate in your arteries, constant

worrying can actually cause worries to solidify in your being. And just as cholesterol creates blockages in your arteries, depression

creates energy blockages in your being. Depression is felt as a total low, a state past all hope. It is a state where we have handed over our controls to a monster we have created ourselves.

On the physical level, worry quickly manifests itself as ailments of the stomach (just check how often you need to visit the bathroom on the day of an exam or a job interview!). This is significant, because worry is closely connected to the Manipuraka Chakra, located in the navel region. The energy of this chakra, which controls the functions of digestion and elimination, gets locked by constant worrying.

How to conquer Worry? To even understand Worry, we need to possess a deep insight into the nature of our own minds. The way into Worry is through the mind, and only through the mind can we find a way out. Instead, we insist on searching for answers in all the wrong places - in external circumstances. We tell ourselves, If only I had enough money there would be nothing to worry about, If only I was more good-looking, If only, If only... this is a truly futile exercise.

A small story:

One evening Nitti Mudaliar was found searching earnestly for something. in the courtyard before his house. When his wife asked him about it he replied that he had dropped a coin. His wife joined in the search. Soon others gathered and practically the whole neighbourhood was searching for the lost coin, to no avail.

Suddenly one young man asked Nitti, 'Which is the precise point where you dropped the coin? Even half an hour's search has yielded no results!"

"Oh," said Nitti, "I lost the coin inside the house".

"Then why are we searching here?", cried an amazed neighbour. "The problem is", said Nitti, "I have no lights inside my house.

Out here at least there's the streetlamp. We can search by its light."

Amused? It won't amuse you to know that we go about our search for freedom from worry in much the same manner without a clue as to its true causes and nature.

Once you understand how the mind works, this becomes simple. Just as a key can be used both to lock and to unlock a door, you can use the words playing in your mind to sink into depression or rise into ecstasy.

The mantra to combat worry is simple: continuous positive thinking.

Be alert. Whenever you become aware of a negative thought surfacing, begin to feed your mind positive thoughts instead. It is not an easy task, of course. In the beginning, when you utter positive words, your mind which has been trained to respond negatively is not going to learn these words easily. A small corner of your mind will continue to protest, "Do you think I'm a fool to be taken in by a few positive words?"

But by and by, you can alter the quality of the mind. It is perfectly possible to change your mental programming – after all, you have programmed it! You know how to do it. Now just do it.

The moment you see how easily worry can be created and destroyed by mere words, you will realize how unreal it is. To go beyond inner chatter for even a few moments is to become aware, to become alive. The very understanding of how unnecessary worry is, naturally unlocks the treasures of manipuraka chakra. Suffering dissolves of its own accord. And in its place arises that state which neither pleasure or pain can disturb - the state of Ānanda, bliss.

With jñāna and dhyāna, awareness and practice, suffering itself can be the door that leads you to THE SUPREME PONTIFF OF HINDUISM BHAGAWAN SRI NITHYANANDA PARAMASHIVAM, eternal bliss.

My blessings are always with you.

At least you have realized that comparison only brings misery that is a good beginning!

Buddha makes a statement of tremendous significance. He says: nothing exists except in relationship. Everything is relative, and draws its meaning only from its relationship with something else.

What are the words you use to compare yourself to others? Beautiful. Rich. Clever. Unucky. Young. Weak. And so on.

Now, imagine yourself on some new planet, where nobody lived but you. Would you then be beautiful or ugly? Tall or short? Rich or poor? Without comparison, these words naturally lose their meaning. Because they are only concepts formulated by the mind; they have no real existence.

Try this: close your eyes for a few moments. Imagine yourself all

alone in the world. Do you feel ugly or beautiful inside? Foolish or wise? Where are all these concepts then? Only the fact that you exist remains - because that is the only truth.

To compare yourself with someone else is foolishness, because you can never be anyone else - and no one else can be you! Look around you. Do you know anyone else who is exactly the same as you? Don't you see how special you are?

It is said that a disciple once approached a Zen master and asked him, "When will I become like Buddha?" In answer, the master slapped him furiously across the face. Was it because the disciple was hoping for too much? NO. The master simply had to jolt the disciple into the awareness that he was already a Buddha! How can you want to become something you already are?

You are so out of touch with your inner being that you have

forgotten how extraordinary you really are. Once you realise this, the need to compare dies naturally. Even if you wanted to, each person is so different that where is a common point of reference? So drop the attitude of comparison. Remember, you are truly unique - just like everyone else!

Q. I have just found a most wonderful partner, but I'm so worried that this relationship is too good to last!

Too good to last! This is really worry at its peak! To worry about not having anything to worry about is the most cunning game of the mind. The mind will never let you relax into the present - it has to keep imposing the past and future upon you. But to love is to forget both past and future - to surrender totally to the delights of the present.

Examine the true reason for your fear.

Something that is simply too beautiful is happening to you. So beautiful that you feel you've done nothing to deserve it! So you start fearing the moment when it will be over. When is he going to find someone more beautiful, more talented, more rich? How am I going to prevent it? What will happen if he leaves?

But no matter how much you worry, is there any way you can prevent anything from happening? You don't possess your partner. You don't know when he might change his mind - you don't even understand your own mind! To imagine that you can control the situation is sheer foolishness. Trying too hard to hold onto a relationship is the most certain way to destroy it. Ultimately, all insecurities arise from a lack of trust in oneself. In love, one simply has to trust oneself. Only then can you trust your partner, and trust in your relationship. There is no other way. Of course, no one can promise you that your relationship will last. Why do you want it to? Change is the nature of life. Accept that the relationship is here today, and it it is beautiful. Yes, it may not be the same tomorrow. Isn't that all the more reason to enjoy it completely today? There will be enough time to feel the pain when it has gone.

And the truth is, if you have loved completely, with your entire being, there will be no suffering in letting go of a relationship when it no longer works. To be afraid to love simply because it may not last is as foolish as refusing to live because your are certain to die someday!

Q. Even though I am trying to change into a better person, I worry about being punished for my past sins.

We are never punished for our sins! Rather, we are punished by

them. Sin always carries its own punishment. In fact, it is the concept of delayed punishment that allows people to commit sin; it is reassuring to know that one can sin now and pay for it later, maybe only on Judgement day or even in another life! The fact is that sin and punishment always come together. And I'm not talking about theft or murder. To me, sin is any act that is commited in unawareness. Even over-eating is a sin - and it usually brings its punishment in the long run. When you're angry, when you're jealous or revengeful, you are committing violence on your own being. Your inner state is thrown out of key, your peace is ruined. Even a few minutes of anger can poison your entire system, and it will be hours or days before you can regain your normal state.This is your sin and your suffering.

Guilt is the most common and most major form of punishment you can inflict upon yourself. People usually pay for small, entirely forgettable sins with years of unnecessary guilt - like

you are doing right now! The truth is, when you drop the guilt, you drop the sin also. A person committing adultery may be so lost in love that she is not conscious of sinning at all. Without the guilt, she is no longer a sinner, only a lover.

This is what Heaven and Hell actually are - psychological states of mind. You won't find them on a map of the universe - they exist only inside your own mind. And worry and guilt are the surest ways to enter into Hell.

Guilt is useful in a limited way, in that it keeps you from committing the same mistake twice. If you have learnt your lesson, it is time to drop the guilt. No point in worrying about mistakes already made; there is no greater sin than refusing to let go of your past!

Q. This whole issue of Enlightenment worries me. Am I working towards it in the right way?

If you're working towards Enlightenment - and worrying about it, on top of that - you can be sure you won't get anywhere close! The only way to apporach Enlightenment is to forget about it altogether. Of course, it's not easy to forget, but the problem with focusing too hard on the destination is that you miss out on the joys of the journey. Surrender to the present moment, and the future will take care of itself.

The worry about enlightenment is the last big declaration of the ego. Don't be deceived by it; it is only taking you further away from your destination. Enlightement can happen only when you are in the egoless state, ready to receive. Enlightenment is not a performance, it is not something to be achieved through anxiety and effort. On the contrary, when you are ready you will slip into it of your own accord, naturally and effortlessly. In the meantime, do the best sadhna you can: simply Enjoy!